Cindi loved the purring of her V8 and driving fast was far better than sex with Ralph.
She pressed the accelerator a bit more and felt her sport car clinging to the road approaching another bend in the road.
“I like surprises” she’d told Ralph, but she had expected diamond rings rather than manipulated brakes.
Suddenly: twisted metal, crushed glass, oil and blood.
Painlessly she passed into darkness; light was entering from a faraway door opening to blinding light.
Then she was back in paraplegic dependency.
Now she cannot say a thing; she only watches as Ralph claims her property.
To me the door worked as a metaphor for being close to dying. My first impression that I went with.
I’ve been on hiatus and reenter into the frenzy of Friday Fictioneers. Rochelle hosts and present us with a picture, and we follow, telling our own stories.
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August 16, 2017
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Dark and sinister, Bjorn
Ouch….the dark side, alright
I wonder with her fate as it is if she wouldn’t have been better dying.
Oh man, I’m just going to go lie down in a darkened room!
Sad and sinister. The worst bit, that she has to lie there and watch him take her stuff. That would literally drive you insane. Nicely twisted, Bjorn
This is exceptional storytelling. Outstanding work; I can’t even pick a favorite part, it’s all so good.
Door is a great metaphor and the story gripping.
Welcome back, Bjorn – you returned with a bang! Sad and well written. (This door took me to a close to death story, too.)
Well, that’s the most tragic thing I’ve read today. 😉 Great story.
Tried to comment on yours… I do love the dog’s perspective.
That’s delightfully twisted. Well written there, Bjorn
Oh my days Bjorn, that’s really unexpected.
What happened? (Great use of the confusion)
A powerful piece, Bjorn. Well done, especially the ending. Love the irony.
Welcome back.. eesh… talk about dark. I almost wish she didn’t come back through the door….
This gave me chills, Bjorn. The inhumanity of it all! A scary piece.
Welcome back from hiatus! Brrr, what a chilling ending — such a thrilling ride leading to the worst possible outcome.
Dear Björn,
It’s good to see you back but…um…my that was dark. She should’ve kept going to the light. Well written in any case and it’s still good to have you back. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
Wow! Trust a snake… well told story — and nice to see you sharing stories again.
Hullo Bjorn – nice to meet you – hope your hiatus did it’s job, wove its magic, as you have done with this dark tale of indifference and revenge. Such vivd descriptions, evoking such powerful emotions, in so few words.
Good to see you back, your post this week reminds me what flash fiction is about. Just a really great piece of writing.
You drew me in with the title. Can’t say I want to have sex with Ralph either. At my age, it’s hard to top a good bowel movement.
I’ve read a lot of near-death experience books. Once they’ve been on the other side, none want to come back. I find that comforting.
Russell, saw your comment, could help saying… Once you’ve been on the ‘other side’ you’ll understand that your ultimate best day here is HELLE in comparison. 🙂 BTDT!
I’m sure you’re right, Jelli. Actually, it’s something I’m looking forward to, but just right away. I think there are still more things I need to accomplish in this life first. Of course, that’s just my opinion. The Lord may see if differently.
That should read, “just NOT right away.”
It’s okay, I got what what you were trying to say. 🙂
oohhh, how tragic! Definitely not the ending I was expecting, and yet so perfect.
How terribly sad for Cindy!
A heart – wrenching tale.
A tale of two shallow, materialistic beings. You’ve drawn them very well, both explicitly and implicitly. As with all the best flash fiction, the story continues beyond the words. Nicely written!
I didn’t see that coming, nor did she I suspect. Brilliant.
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Well written piece that packed a punch. I loved the contrast between her feeling so alive and in charge to her helplessness at the end.
A terrific opening on a compelling flash fiction piece,
Written well !!
Poor Cindi…and I think she was right to prefer driving the car-
He manipulated her, then her brakes… nasty chap. Great story!
Very dark interpretation of the prompt. I like it!
Surprise! …diamond rings rather than manipulated brakes – wow nicely done!
I’m sure Karma will get him in the end.
what a twist. poor woman. totally unexpected ending.
Dark, Björn! A mean take on car enthusiasts. Hitchcockian.
…or should I say Bergmanian?
Good seeing you again, Bjorn! And back with a vengeance, too. I’m with Russell on this. 😀 Nice work.
Excellent. Something I hadn’t thought of at all.
She’d have been better off going into the light. Glad to see you back, Bjorn!
I think I would have rather died.
naaice
well written
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Oooo sinister and nasty. What a story this week Bjorn!
That was cruel and brutal, Björn, and very, very good.
Actually, it’s something I’m looking forward to, but just rightfield away. glad to see you back, Bjorn!
dang thats good
glad to see you bjorn