You were a rivulet

Once you were a rivulet, cascading
glittered independence, free,
before desire, hormoned, bedsheets
gravity turned you stagnant
skin on skin, entrapped in bogs
of merging tributaries, you are mired
trapped and slandered here,
in the city of loquacious walls you are
fenced in rot, our passion stale,
we gently flow, we’re tethered tight

but trust me dear together
we will reach the froth of sea.

The swamp by Gustav Klimt

The swamp by Gustav Klimt

Today I’m one third through NaPoWriMo and prompted by Magaly at toads I took three titles of my own poetry and wrote this short poem. I also link this poem to Poetry Pantry.

April 10, 2016

39 responses to “You were a rivulet

  1. If that bubbling streams had high hopes as it rushed down from its source they were surely dashed by the polluted river and only relieved when the boundless sea was reached. perhaps we should do this more and humanize the inanimate to understand the damage we do.

  2. Each link seems to flower into more perspectives of a life stage that has been the bubble of youthful bravado, but now is enshrined in the night and tethered… but two as one… together meandering to the Great Sea. An interesting poem.

  3. A wonderful contrast between the first and second movement, and a chance to love your titles all over again.

  4. I like the sense of assurance given at the end. It touched me knowing there is a promise of responsibility & commitment to care for the other through the journey no matter what happens. 🙂

  5. At times I thought the subject was a woman. Clever wayof using poetry (your own) title as part of a new poem. It won’t be stagnant, Bjorn 🙂

  6. Isn’t wonderful to look back (mistakes, triumphs, failures, wins…) and she how we have grown, or at least changed? In the beginning, that rivulet would have not survived at sea… and if the speaker had gone on his own, I’m sure the sea would have eaten him. but together, oh what a pair they make! I see them swimming, and diving, and surfing… and discovering all kinds of treasures.

  7. The way relationship eddies and flows, and the prison and the raft of it, all finely drawn here, Bjorn. Like Shay, not so sure i actually want to feel that froth, tethered like a shipwrecked sailor to a mast.

  8. What a great idea, merging the idea of a rivulet merging with a stream, which ultimately makes it somehow to the sea, with love. With being with and for someone else. Really like this.

  9. DANG. This couplet is fantastic:
    “but trust me dear together
    we will reach the froth of sea.”

    The absence of comma makes the word “together” the one you are addressing. LOVE.

  10. Weaving those titles in is a cool idea. Great idea for a new poem. I love the journey described here, and the certainty both will reach the sea. I love “tethered tight” especially.

  11. Ha. I had to reread “hormoned” several times. That does cause changes. Still, you end on a happier note. This was fun.

  12. Oh, I ADORE this, Bjorn….the journey this young rivulet takes is stunning and I do hope it ends in sea froth 🙂

  13. Relationship carry the challenge of “ups and downs” i like your vision of staying together through thick and thin

    thanks for dropping in to read mine

    much love…

  14. “Together” is one of the most powerful words in the English language. It is absolutely astonishing what human beings can accomplish together.

  15. What a clever way of composing a poem – those loquacious walls drew me in the most…an intense and passionate poem – in all the best ways

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