Where craziness of dreadful dreamy doors
were sprouting brimstone braille for passing clowns,
and tape recorders sold in flower stores,
were filled with netherworldly unknowns sounds:
amazing music with an echo from its halls;
unthrottled engine beats and lucid words
once told in city of loquacious walls.
The city where the mayors sang with birds.
and drywalls spelled the language of the law
as citizens were silent slaves to stones;
where bricks and mortar-gods were held in awe,
and bleeding hearts were turned to bones.
But once from walls of Babel we were free
With walls inside we’ll never more agree.
Linked to Real Toads where Kerry challenge us to change a booktitle to a new title for a poem. I will also link this to Poetry Pantry.
—
January 17, 2014
Björn Rudbergs writings
Poetry and fiction by a physicist from the dark side
Your poem takes me on quite a journey, Bjorn, and your mention of a ‘city of loquacious walls plays with my imagination & makes me realize we all have walls of one kind, it seems. Inside or outside. For better or worse.
Yes, showing us a nice picture here, asking to look at ourselves …
I wonder how long I could tolerate loquacious walls. The closing lines made me think of the walls we create for ourselves.
This one’s interesting…like the painting, thoughts spiral up (or down) but “loquacious walls” is a great phrase for Babel…wondering if the walls have ears?!
I see this piece in two forms: one as a political statement and second as an introspection. There is some intense imagery in your words. The last line is particularly intriguing.
A wonderful write. 🙂
Oh Bjorn, I read this with such admiration for the way you string your words together….way too many wonderful lines and images to repeat. I simply loved this. The title is spectacular all on its own and the photo perfection.
This is excellent in word, phrase and meter but none of those trumps the brilliance of your description. The artwork is an inspired choice but your words took me there.
wow
awesome sonnet – and such a perfect match with the painting – and oh those inside walls are worse than those outside
happy sunday björn
Give me silence.
Wonderful title, wonderful picture, and your poem must surely be accurate for what goes on within such walls! (I’m with Cosmo.)
love what u did with the title
Do you think so? I think we freed ourselves long ago–walked out those amazing doors, turned, and went right back in. Not me personally, but those who found chaos and cacaphony profitable.
It certainly is a an exhaustive tour around. Appreciate the imagery of so many leads. Great write Bjorn!
Hank
Internal walls are the hardest ones to demolish…every word seemed to ooze from this Bruegel painting and into wonderful poem
It is very humbling to look on old walls and realize they have seen more than you have.
Yes there is more to the tower of babel than just the tower, the whole of the story of God and humanity in a few verses. Love how you have captured the struggle of humanity and the entrapment of freedom. Excellent.
you write the sonnet beautifully with the wall metaphor.
sometimes it amazes me how they build such wall when technology is comparably on the low side then..
its interesting…i am reading a book on a city where the inhabitants were once worshipped as gods until a disease came upon them and then they were outcasts and reviled…..nice job on the form…walls can protect…but they can also seperate
We can’t build walls that totally protect us any more. There’s no such security. Well done, Bjorn. 🙂 — Suzanne
Surreal & fantastic imagery of the city of loquacious walls ~ Within those walls, one feels lost & ever divided ~
Wonderful job on the sonnet form Bjorn~
nice interpretation… kinda cool writing about history… nice depth to this piece
Reblogged this on A Mirror Obscura, and commented:
An outstanding poem in many ways. >KB
Many thanks.
An ingenious and engaging sonnet, Bjorn, and both alluring and scarily dreary–a very difficult mood to achieve, and acheived neatly here. My favorite line in this voyage across the too-real surreal is ‘The city where the mayors sang with birds..” an image which started out seeming light and free, then made me wonder if perhaps the birds were not very nice birds at all.
Or the mayors sang with birds and let the people be ruled by walls… My thought with that line was that leader lacking responsibility might do just like that..
Love the title ~ if walls could talk, how much they would say about the city and its inhabitants. Strong imagery and rhyme.
Feels like it’s been a long time Bjorn – mainly cos it has I suppose! Have to say Truth comes through the surreality you employ here – excellent…
With Best Wishes Scott
Such a very creative subject for a poem and a very interesting approach to a mythic idea–the idea of these loquacious walls (and how they are made that way) is so cleverly and fancifully detailed–really wonderful, Bjorn. And a sonnet too! k.
You know me and iambs.. I just love to keep them coming (I actually never count the syllables any longer)
Wow! Excellent!
First of all, “loquacious” is such a delicious word! And then….everything that follows the title is just icing on the cake….the alliteration, the vivid imagery, the mythical quality to it all, the energy of the word choices…..this is an incredible piece. Love it 🙂
Bjorn I think this poem is really amazing because of the antique feel that you’ve given it. It reminded me of a description of the ancient Greek monuments. Really cool.
Wow, Bjorn!! The depth to this is outstanding – I love the layering effect of this and as synchronicity would have it, it’s interesting that we both touched upon some of the same topic pieces. Your reference to Babylon and the walls within work so well…separations of self from the united self. Well written!
The walls inside can be made of the hardest stones. I like the dreamy feel of this. The ending is great.
I took this stunning piece as an extended metaphor regarding communication. During the building of the Tower of Babel: ” the Lord said, “Indeed the people are one and they all have one language, and this is what they begin to do; now nothing that they propose to do will be withheld from them.” And so he created many languages.
So it is, with our endless devices to “communicate”. We have surrendered our personal space, with nary a qualm as to the social cost to be paid. It seems to me, all this blah-blah-blah (aka: disrespected confidences, cyberbullying, identity theft and on and on) extorts much, much more than we thought we had bargained for.
The hubris of mankind is seldom rewarded with perfect success. And so, human communication does not always produce the expected results.
But really, there is so much to this poem, I suspect I’ve only just scratched the surface.
So many nice images here! I especially like the strength of “bleeding hearts were turned to bones”, The poem is a trip by itself. The last two verses are perfect, they ground and open the poem’s interpretation at the same time.
Great poem, those walls are a powerful symbol
There is a lucid, fantastic quality to this poem. It reads so smoothly. It says so much, there is so much to consider in this one.
Fantastic. I love the lilting rhythms… this best read aloud I think…I love the feeling of progression, and then the finish.
Unfortunately, I think it is self-created intellectual and spiritual walls that imprison many now.
Whoa–what a striking piece, Bjorn. Walls–they do separate, don’t they?
I loved reading this, Bjorn. ‘bleeding hearts were turned to bones’, there’s just something about that line. . . .Very nice write!
…took me like an hour to cursor down all the compliments 🙂 I adore history related poems and this brings babel to life – I can’t help wish you had recorded this – I’d love to hear it in your accent 🙂
Wow! “with walls inside we’ll never more agree” What truth! Great write.
Thank you Bjorn for the internal journey, love how this flows.
An interesting and artful examination of external and internal constraints…the further we move from the world of physical action, the more we find that what we’ve built inside is what really controls us. Well done.
Steve K.
loved the surreal images.
is this a dig at politics and big business? 🙂
It’s pompous yet mighty sonnet! I love idea of doors. First the doors were wild open, then we started to lock ourselves with many keys. Now, we open doors again in many ways and senses, which is good. By the way, in 2015, the opportunities will be doubled and some extra doors will be open for ones who open themselves to possibilities… (y)
sounds like an awesome piece of history!
the picture accommodates the writing so well.
It reads as ancient history and yet contemporary, too. Knocked another one out of the park, Bjorn.
I love this.
Very interesting…
Excellent! We do all build walls inside of us creating our own Babel!