Once as sunbeam, bright
she shone; embrightend
those around, until the day
she met the lover-nemesis
the man who burnt her heart.
He stole delight and light,
to flame her veins with ice,
and as slave enslaved she
barefoot strolled around on glass,
while he lit his fuse to burst.
Her brittle soul embrittled
by his fists and rough rebuke
shattered, broke and spread
its leaflike wings to leave
what little life she still had left.
Woman in bath by Roy Lichtenstein
Today at dVerse we are playing with polyptotons. How many can you find?
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October 24, 2019
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Nicely done, Björn. I especially like ‘He stole delight and light, / to flame her veins with ice’.
This polyptoton on “slave” emphasized her condition well: “and as slave enslaved she”
Wow. This is excellent Bjorn.
nicely penned. I found several.. good work!
I found at least five, brother; a sad and stark tale. These days it should have been the cad who died, not the sunbeam.
Good use of the device….but for me…these words
“as slave enslaved she
barefoot strolled around on glass,
while he lit his fuse to burst.”
so aptly, and horrifyingly describe a woman in an abusive relationship.
I totally agree with Lilian’s comment and interpretation.
Miriam
I absolutely agree, Lillian
Well-woven with polyptotonic delight.
Well done! You are an overachiever with this poem 😉
Domestic abuse polyptotoned! I bow.
He stole delight and light,
to flame her veins with ice,
Great imagery and use of the prompt, Bjorn!
Skilfully woven words and a heart-wrenching narrative. Well done.
Interesting approach to the polyptoton here Björn — I enjoyed this, 🙂
Wow! You really managed to put things into words that I don’t know I’ll ever be able to. May I re-blog this?
Please feel free to reblog
This is a beautifully written poem, and the narrative is one that easily tugs at the empath in me. Your use of polyptotons is also exemplary.
My favourite is ‘brittle soul embrittled’ a beautiful sounding poem even given the topic and rough rebuke.
Your use of polyptotons are amazing throughout the poem. Always fun to see what you come up with for a prompt.
I love how you wove this, sad though it is, a wonderful read.
Great use of the device. Nicely woven to capture the pain of a recipient of abuse.
Well penned, Björn – polyptotons would have me stumped
This is an excellent example of using polyptotons.