Don’t blame the night
for darkness or the rattling bones;
it’s not from dusk your blood is shed
not from shadows that your ache is born.
this blackness didn’t cause your dread.
Don’t blame the night
for cloaks and daggers, cause the fear
that choke me… makes you snore
cause sleeplessness for me… Oh dear
it’s not the night, the fault is yours.
Linked to OLN at dVerse
March 21, 2019
I love your refrain, /don’t blame the night/. I got a little lost with the point of view, as it shifted, from death to snoring. Perhaps it is your dark and clever humor.
Ha… I thought maybe a murder caused by the snoring.
The repeated ‘Don’t blame the night’ had me humming Patti Smith’s ‘Because the night…’ I love the rich darkness of this poem and I couldn’t help a little smile at the snoring.
My wife complained about my snoring last night. What do you know that we don’t know?
Again, the way you interact with deep themes is always impressive.
This is incredibly dark and stirring, Bjorn! I can relate to the sleepless nights caused by a certain individual’s snoring 🙂
At least you will not murder the snorer…
I took this at a deeper level, as if the snoring is that of the suicide victim, oblivious to the havoc they have left behind.
For years I tried to get to sleep before my husband started snoring! This made me smile. I was beginning to fear everyone was going to write a pantoum and my little ode would stand out like a sore thumb, so your poem reassured me! (smile)
I like to let the dark off the hook, but now I am suspicious about whose fault it is!
The ending made me smile – oh dear on that snoring. Love the refrain of: Don’t blame the night
Didn’t expect the snoring…clever.
I like how you put the choking and snoring together.
There is both seriousness and playfulness in the rhymes, and it feels nicely rounded, sounding both as an observation and a warning.
Clever ending. Well done.
I loved the last line, and the image you chose.
The fear within… the cause of all our stress and sleepless nights. Well done.
I like the idea of not blaming the night. I would have liked it developed and not as abstract. I guess you are writing to the picture.
Ha – Darkness lurks hopefully, it won’t end with dread. I do wonder why dark thoughts always surface at night.
This seems like, “It’s not you, it’s me…it’s not the night, it is you!”
That was a very decisive solution to solve the annoying snoring Björn . A CPAP machine might have been more humane, but less absolute.
Snoring does make the person kept awake want to kill. Fun twist. 🙂
Ah yes, blame comes full circle. And the snoring, well, we trace a lot back to there.
The ending was a little unexpected but enjoyed the dark humour.