Elemental passion


When seeds awaken, gently from the warmth
of spring, I’m cradled in your growth, in arms
of verdant strength, from soil, from deep below
your breath’s a symphony, the dryad’s charm.


When from the south as breeze, you come, bestow
my skin with bloom, perfume; when curtains blow
and billow, move with air, your hair’s the rose
with petals moving, undulating from your flow .


When from your streams in cold caress, my toes
are curling, licked by tongues, is kissed, unclothed,
to fill my mouth with taste as tart as wine;
united surface moves as we are close.


When from the embers flames, our limbs entwined
arise in glow, your heat is weight that binds
our hearts; release us from the chains we wore
in fall, your flesh is nested next to mine.


When afterwards your breath and mine are sworn
to voids , from where our skin and stars are born,
inside the flare of aftermath your whisper’s warm
with promises of rain — tomorrow’s storms.

The Kiss by Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec

This is my first Rubáyiat now reworked with even more imagery per the instructions of Jilly at dVerse connected to the five elements, as well as weaving some improvements from the feedback I got in the first session. A poem like this is never finished.
February 14, 2018

14 responses to “Elemental passion

  1. Nice smooth changes; subtle and clever rhyming. We all labor to find a spot closer to perfection. I went with 10 syllable lines this time.

  2. adding the senses made this very rich. my favourite is the air stanza, the perfume in the air and billow is skin tingling good

  3. This is a well executed revision of what was already and excellent poem. Bravo Bjorn, well done! Per your comment, I find the essence of a poem is never wholly finished. They always beg revision, or inspire spin offs – but for me that is the joy of writing poetry. Nice work here!

  4. Such an evocative poem that I would almost hate to tinker with, but the slight changes you made improved the flow, in my reading, especially here….”to voids , from where our skin and stars are born” vs. “with vacuum, from where space and stars are born”.
    Every sense is tantalized through your images of the elements.

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