“Okey-dokey we’re ready Mr Bender.”
“You took your time, where’s the button and the codes?”
“The button?”
“For launching ´em of course, those darn McClures keep trespassing my property, not to mention Mrs Duffy’s chicken.”.
“Oh, you want the launcher to be added, sorry sir, we weren’t informed. The order clearly states nuclear missiles, not launcher, you’ll have to wait a couple of days for a license, though.”
“A license, you’re demented for fuck sake, I know the constitution, how long’s the wait.”
“Just two days, and it’s another 100 bucks.”
“Bloodsucking maggots, but I can’t wait to exercise my rights.”
© Shaktiki Sharma
This is the first time in a long time I write a story in just dialogue, sorry for misunderstanding the pictures. I thought it looked like some missile launcher, not grindstones. Anyway, I guess the genre is dark humor.
Friday Fictioneers is a group of bloggers, under the command of General Rochelle Wisoff-Fields who run this army of bloggers to new horizons every week. Join us to write your 100 word fiction entry.
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September 14, 2016
Haha! A right to bear arms taken to the extreme! Great tale Bjorn 🙂
Unbearable really.. 🙂
Nicely done Bjorn. I didn’t know what the picture was either!
Ha.. I read Rochelle’s before I wrote mine… but I decided to go with my first idea anyway.
Seems like you did as well as any of us with the prompt. It was enigmatic
Indeed… not easy to see what it is.
Yikes…sadly, it often seems this is the direction in which we are going. Nice twist on the photo 😉
I think we are just a few steps away… right now I think the border is slightly below tanks…
😦
trespassing chickens is a wonderful reason to install a few nukes!
I think it sucks to have to give a reason to claim you rights 🙂 Nuke ’em all.
Bjorn, this is deliciously cynical and a perfect indictment of the “exercising my rights” people. You are spot on! Love it. Thanks for visiting, sorry it took awhile to get back to you. Amy
Just from an external observer… no rights to carry here…
Some say it’s a right, some think it should be a privilege. Not stating which side I am on of course 🙂
Just saying that there’s always a limit.
Yuo would think. I enjoyed your post, forgot to mention it.
🙂 unusual for me…
Political undertones here. Such an delicate issue. I don’t know what I would have thought that photo to be.
It was really hard for me… for an outsider it’s hard to understand its delicacy though…
This is really funny. I always enjoy seeing what I can read into the names you choose for your vignettes, assigning additional meanings (whether you intended them or not). For example, because the word “exercise” is used in the title and because his name is Mr. Bender, I’m picturing this all going down right after he finished his workout; so I think he’s wearing a fuzzy headband and one of those tight stretchy onesie outfits.
I’m particularly fond of the coarse language … especially the use of the “f” word and the part about maggots. 🙂 I heart the fuck/(100)buck(s) rhyme. Hilarious. I think this is really clever.
Ha.. a tad unusual for me… actually the names in my stories are taken from a random generator for names… really funny.
Oh really? So “Mr. Stuffy’s chicken” is an accident then? 🙂 That’s how I hear it, anyway. And I’ll save you the specifics about the imagery it draws up.
Nice cautionary tale of a world gone mad. Glad you explained the link to the prompt 🙂
Ha… i wonder how the domestic missile-silos would look like, and I guess it’s pretty close… Just had installations done at home, and you need to make sure you get what you are due
🙂
Dear Björn,
Honestly I wouldn’t have known what they were if I hadn’t had inside information. 😉 On the other hand it’s about what you see. You’ve nothing to apologize for and a good story to boot.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Sometimes it’s best to go with that first impression…
Jeez! I don’ t think I want your finger on the nuclear button any more than Trump’s! Poor Mrs. Duffy’s Chicken and poor United States of America too.
I prefer no buttons at all to be frank… but I guess if there is one on either side I want the best possible finger.
Timely and funny. Great black humour, Björn. And about delicate–the madman threatens the world, not only his country, we have a right to voice our concerns.
I think we are threatened already by the existing madmen…
That’s who I meant. 🙂
Ooh, that Mr Bender is pretty cross. I like the dark humour in this.
He has a right to be cross… chickens can be a nuisance.
Great dark humor and dialogue, Bjorn. Let’s hope the “right to bear arms” never goes that far. I’m sure it’s already gone farther than our forefathers ever dreamed it would. Good writing. 🙂 — Suzanne
Probably has… and for an outsider I lack to see the purpose…
Very appropriate and really made me grin. Well done, Bjorn.
Yes, those chickens really deserves to be nuked…
‘I knoe my rights’ is the cry of many people who don’t, but your misinterpretation of the picture led to a fun story. I concentrated on the fireplace and ignored thos oddities on the floor!
Maybe I should try to misunderstand more often
The right to bear arms … should have ripped off his sleeves.
Nice job, Bjorn.
Or at least his fingers to push that button.
I think I’m awfully glad I’m not Mr. Bender’s neighbor. He might not like my cat. Great take on an odd prompt.
Yes a cat would be in terrible trouble…
Oh dear!
And sadly we are heading in that direction aren’t we?
I think we might be safe from this.
The ultimate destination for the “right to bear arms”. A great point made in a humorous way.
I had no idea what those things were either. Some sort of paint mixing device, I thought 🙂
I guess that this might not happen… or at least not without a proper license…
Mr Bender, he such a bad man, you can take a gun off a bad man, but how do you take a nuclear missiles away.
Easy… you just have to get Nuclear missiles yourself… isn’t that what cold war is all about.
Pity you are not writing for Mr Trump, Bjorn.
Same message but with a lashing of humour.
Nicely done.
I wonder if he would laugh at this…
Looks like missiles become commonplace. Your comment on the arms race, I think!
Arms race and self-defense … all the same… maybe Mr Bender needs to build a big wall that the neighbors pay for…
Misunderstanding what is in the picture makes for fun and unique stories! I like your take.
Thank you.. that’s what fun when you cannot see the grindstones in time
I tell you the whole right to bear arms thing here in the States is like a grindstone. It has worn my patience to the very last straw. Your post is spot on!
Indeed … yes that’s a brilliant connection.
This guy is scary!
If it had been guns instead of missiles he would have sounded normal…
Even neighbourhood annihilation can be delayed by slip-ups when you don’t read the contract carefully. Probably a good thing. Great response to the prompt, Bjorn.
Yup… people not reading the manual sometimes saves the world too…
Thank you for letting me know those were grindstones. : )
I think you did a fabulous write on the prompt. It took the prompt into
a different direction I enjoyed. I love these prompt because everyone see something different. Have a great week …
Isadora 😎
You’d make a great nuclear arms salesman. Always upcharge for the extras I say.
That’s such a nice way to get rid of those blasted trespassing chickens. Just don’t eat them afterwards. It might make your teeth glow.
I knew there would be an issue… glow of teeth.
(the picture): I got it right away.