32 responses to “My winter coat’s too thick”

1. Oh, it is hard when one’s credit card doesn’t work; and I definitely empathize with having a winter coat too warm for waiting…. Some nice wordplay in this one, Bjorn.

2. oh the trials and tribulations of shopping. you’ve captured them perfectly.

3. Happy Advent to you Bjorn. I love how you used alliteration and a sort of subtle echo throughout this poem that sets itssuch a mood. My winter coat is not heavy enough.

4. I especially love the way this poem ends….I can feel the trickle of sweat as one fumbles with the card in disbelief…..good one, Bjorn!

5. Love the last six lines. “Sweat” was an effective touch.

6. I’m smiling, Bjorn. 🙂 I think what you were “buying” can’t be wrapped.
   Hence and excuse to keep it away from you.
   ..

7. Those few moments…that seem like a lifetime..enjoyed that Bjorn.. the centipedes and crabs creeping under the skin..such a vivid image.

8. Patience is a virtue, sadly I have very little. Such an unusual, yet descriptive piece.

9. you’ve nicely caught that sensation during the wait…

10. The quagmire of Christmas shopping how hateful it is…even though it is summer here.

11. I just always love your wordplay, especially in this one. I could feel the sweat from that hot winter coat. And the credit card, yikes! Thanks for the read.

12. delightful poem! what great imagery with those critters. and what panic washes over when the credit card won’t work! 🙂

13. Gorgeous writing 🙂

14. Sounds most uncomfortable! 🙂

15. A dread that occurs at the most inappropriate moment. Sales too good to miss and one just sweat under heavy clothing. Chuckles! Some light write here Bjorn!

    Hank

16. People drastically change in department stores at this time of year!

17. Those crystallised moments in time – frozen in queues..in waiting..thankfully our thoughts never stop and we can put them on paper – quite beautifully here..such a wonderful coat of thoughts…

18. Happy Advent Bjorn, ofttimes waiting can get under ours skin, but should we wait in hope and joy, its well worth the prize.

    much love…

19. Happy Advent Bjorn! You have captured the waiting perfectly with earthworms and jelly fish and that all too familiar too warm winter coat making me melt in every line I wait, wait, wait in!

20. My coat is almost always too thick – shopping to me is worse than crabs and centipedes under the skin – thank goodness for Amazon! But then, Advent – such a joyful waiting, anticipation. happy Advent to you.

21. A warm coat for winter…can be too thick sometimes…sweat trickles.

22. Sweat it out, Consumer!

23. Beautifully penned! Happy advent!

24. heartbeats, drumbeats ..up beat,,,soon…too bad the coat is too heavy..need to lighten the load I think..

25. What I found particularly interesting here, is the form. It just seems to roll out so naturally, that you can almost feel yourself – overheating – in that winter coat. The bit of dialogue is inserted, skillfully, so that it adds to the scene – rather than disrupting it. For some reason the last line really connected with me … perhaps because it, so perfectly, encapsulates the igniting of exasperation (and waiting can be so-o-o exasperating). And, exasperation – once ignited – can built to become a fearsome force.

26. Interesting…love the image of ‘crawling crusts of centipedes’ for time…for me feels as the time of turning within and accepting who we are in this present moment, reviewing and adjusting balance…..taking time to surrender what not working….taking off the thick coat if we will

27. Great use of words and rhythm, Bjorn. I’ve experienced my card not working–terrible. Well done. 🙂 — Suzanne

28. Haha, weirdly spun! That moment of ummmm your credit card doesn’t work, that’s a long moment.

29. So so true! I’ve been there.

30. I’ve given up on Christmas shopping decades ago. Either they get a home made pressie or none at all. I tried to see the metaphor (was it one) of the earthworms?

    • When you are waiting… the tingling feeling, that lack of patience is like earthworms.. so yes a metaphor.

31. I feel the frantic agitation of waiting in this. Love your ending.

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