Even bedbugs

in bluish moonlight
dancing shadow filigree —
even bedbugs leave
tiptoeing as syllables
whispered for a gentle breeze

The Moonlight Bed by Jacek Yerka

The Moonlight Bed by Jacek Yerka

Today Gayle are guestblogging at dVerse MTB, and she discuss on how to write Japanese deathpoems, what would you think that last moment of your life. I see it something happening in moonlight, like falling asleep. The bedbugs leaving is like the rats leaving the sinking ship. Bedbugs is also a winter kigo, that I wanted to include. Come and join us when the pub opens at 3PM EST.

September 24, 2015

27 responses to “Even bedbugs

  1. Terrific, you chose the waka/tanka form, & did a bang up job with it. I forged ahead with the death trilogy; kanshi, waka, & haiku; but who knows if my tone is deft or gentle enough to breath poetically within the form.

  2. I really like the tiptoeing bedbugs, like syllables. Excellent image. Although, a long time friend who is a forensic pathologist would be quick to tell you realistically, those bad boy bedbugs would stay to snack on you. But love the winter kigo of the bedbugs. The kireji of “tiptoeing” perfectly separates the kami-no-ku from the shimo-no-ku. Gently humorous take on the prompt.

  3. Peaceful and cosy feel about this – and I should jolly well hope those bedbugs are leaving, as you wouldn’t want to have to worry about them in the last few minutes of life! I really like the line ‘tiptoeing as syllables’

  4. Lovely, and simultaneously humorous. Well done. And to me this has a true tanka feel to it.

  5. I like this Jisei, Björn. It made me think of my father when he was dying during the SARS epidimec in Toronto…we all had to wear masks regardless of what his condition was but as soon as they disconnected his oxygen and he slowly passed….we were told we could remove our masks. Even the bed bugs flee…
    I wrote mine too late but thought it was a nice practice http://wp.me/p2RsU0-1MB

  6. Pingback: even bedbugs [linked verse] | TheGuern·

I try to reciprocate all comments. If you want me to visit a particular post, please direct me directly to that post.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.