His dreams of landmines – Octave

when cries of sorrow from the distant war’s
diluted drumbeats quenched by falling rain
I meet his eyes across the aisle – a corpse
escaped to safety of sorts – in pain
a lonely refugee that passed through doors
to spend his days on my commuter train
from dreams of landmines and his mother’s death
let him find bliss and share our summer’s breath

From Wikimedia commons

From Wikimedia commons

Yesterday at Sunday Form challenge, Kerry inspired us to do Yeats’ octaves. I tried the first example yesterday and today I do the second form. I link this to Open Link Monday at toads

June 16, 2014

13 responses to “His dreams of landmines – Octave

  1. You have taken this form in your stride, Bjorn. The lines flow without interruption taking the reader along. The portrait you have captured shows a keen understanding of the human spirit.

  2. Such a beautiful form – it’s lilting and summer’s breath will hopefully heal him.

  3. You did good with the form, Bjorn. I think this second one is harder than the first. Land mines have always been a sore in my usual thinking of more pleasant thoughts. They do terrible damage to one.

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