Dolly – 100 words Friday Fictioneers

So now I am doing my third entry for Friday Fictioneers. The first week managed by Rochelle Wisoff. A beautiful picture like this by Rochelle always brings dark thoughts to my mind.

20121025-200948.jpg

Meeting for breakfast at their restaurant was a bittersweet but silent end. The waitress, Dolly, greeted them with her usual smile and they got found their table by the window.

“I got the paper to sign from my solicitor” said Geoff.
“Fine”, she said “but at least let us take some coffee first”

Looking at the spring flowers outside they drank their Java in familiar silence. When Geoff’s face went crimson, and he grasped for air, she screamed:

“Call 911, it must be his heart”

She managed a quick nod to Dolly before the ambulance came.
—–
October 25, 2012

57 responses to “Dolly – 100 words Friday Fictioneers

    • I think home-cooking was ruled out in the first place as even more dangerous. Or are you suggesting that Geoff should learn to cook all of the sudden.

  1. Love that quick nod to Dolly…as in “thanks hon, it worked like a charm.”
    One little word of crit. The word “got” feels clumsy in they “got” their table. Maybe “they found”…only a suggestion.
    Once I attended a workshop taught by a journalist who suggested that get and got should be expunged from literature which started me on got mission to get got and get out of my novel.
    Other than that I have nothing to say.

    • “Get” and “got” are from Saxon English and have been considered incorrect in written English probably from the Norman Conquest in 1066, when French became the aristocratic language, before finally blending with Saxon. They are also incorrect in spoken English, although it is much more difficult to control the spoken word. I was horrified when I was obliged to teach their use in France because the text books were based on spoken English. “I’ve got…” should be “I have…” English teachers are probably the only people who bother with it these days. I occasionally use the abhorred words in my translations, but I’m not very proud of so doing.

  2. Oh darn, he’s having a heart attack (yawn). I can sense the lack of panic in her voice. Her and Dolly will have to go have a cocktail and celebrate. Good one, Bjorn.

  3. It seems that he wanted out, and got his wish with Dolly’s deadly coffee! A well told story best read while enjoying a cup of coffee that you made yourself 🙂

  4. I enjoyed reading this entry. I haven’t got a clue on writing fiction yet, but I love to read these 100 word stories.
    And, thanks for subscribing to my blog. I appreciate it.

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