Wildly into the void

Today,
an autumn filigree,
of fiery boughs,
branches bending
with their fronds aflame,
today
the trees are mad;
silhouettes
against the rouge;
pink eyed perhaps —
they too need emptying;
bending and undressing
for the callous hands
of fall and falling
to my cozy void
of night delight.

Autumn landscape with hunter
Isaac Levitan

Today Sanaa inspires with a few quotes from her own poetry at dVerse. We should also change the sentence with at least one derivative (I also changed punctuation and added line breaks).

The sentence I used was “The trees are mad silhouettes against the rouge pink sky; perhaps they too need emptying.” – A pocketful of maybes.

September 7, 2021

20 responses to “Wildly into the void

  1. I like how you have derived your poem from Sanaa’s words, but adapted them to transform it into your own.
    ‘for the callous hands
    of fall and falling’
    – I love the sound effects of these lines: I feel like I am falling into autumn.

  2. I almost chose this one. I really like how the punctuation and line breaks made a seasonal (autumn) difference to the original poem.

  3. This is absolutely gorgeous, gorgeous writing, Bjorn! 😀 I love how seamlessly you have incorporated the quote here. Especially love the image; “branches bending with their fronds aflame,” you have captured the essence of Autumn so well! Thank you so much for writing to the prompt 💝💝

  4. I so love the way you took something, added a dash of this and that, reconfigured and let other impressions fill in – and then created something so spectacularly colourful and wonderful. From the opening to the end, it’s so rich and luscious, and yet metaphorically complex – it never ceases to amaze me how much is infused in your small verses.
    I fell hard for this part:
    today
    the trees are mad;
    silhouettes
    against the rouge;
    pink eyed perhaps —
    they too need emptying;
    bending and undressing
    for the callous hands
    of fall and falling

    I don’t often do this – but “swoon swoon” — wow!

  5. bending and undressing
    for the callous hands
    of fall and falling
    to my cozy void
    of night delight.

    Great to be welcoming the goodness of Autumn for it fills with delight the still of nights!

    Hank

  6. Bjorn,
    “Autumn filigree,” “fronds aflame,” mad trees “bending and undressing
    for the callous hands/of fall”: This is poetry — world dissolving, world opening. Loved it.
    pax,
    dora

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