from rain —
in hues of Burgundy staining your blouse
the mock-orange choke us with incense
as this evening
Written for Marion at toads, a double Tetractys. I will also link to Poetry Pantry tomorrow morning.
June 9, 2018
This is absolutely exquisite! 💜 Love the subtle hint of sensuality in “hues of Burgundy staining your blouse.” Beautifully rendered.💜
this is such an interesting form – the precision of the “count” means very accurate images offered, yet there are still such layers and mystery to be consumed by the mind ~
it leaves me feeling very satisfied!
I love “reeks of bliss!”
Ah – a summer evening reeking in bliss…that is perfect summer’s eve, I think. I enjoyed your use of color in this poem, Bjorn.
Lovely – and the image is gorgeous
An interesting form – which looks complicated. Well done, Bjorn.
A fun read, Bjorn.
I think I might like your peppermint blues
Red white and blue
Your stained blouse
I love the shape, Bjorn, and the way you’ve imbued your poem with colour.
Well crafted in its entirety.
Enjoyed this summer-y explosion of colors 🙂
not from rain- I just love that opening that then becomes suffused with colour…
I like the intensity.
Moments such as this will be remembered long and will be laughed about for years. Beautifully writen Bjorn.
Wow! Bjorn, this is stunning. I LOVE the way you set out the lines – that adds a whole new dimension in itself.
Pretty, pretty! And the shape of your poem suggests and arrow forward, suggesting… hmmmm, what could evening bring for this couple?
You brought. it I like the contrast and mix of colors and the setting of bliss.
I like the way you shaped this. And the use of color 🙂
I love this!!! A blissful night!
Beautifully expressed ! The picture you painted with your words is hard to forget …sweet memories I believe !
The use of “reeks” dresses the tone in a violent way, leaves me thinking that this sort of brightness and bliss might not be what most people are looking for.
Nice words of bliss and shaped so interestingly
Happy you dropped by my Sunday Standard Bjorn
Simply beautiful!! I want to be transported to that place.
The form looks like a heart, Bjorn. Very sensual 🙂
Quite a strong olfactory sense of summer . Love the shape and the first 3 words: not from rain…..
Bliss! What it is not, and what it is.
I have no idea other than bliss 🙂
Intense and full of color and scent.
I’d say you were enjoying your summer nights.
Love, “reek of bliss”. The double works well here.
This little piece is so loaded – and yet – exquisitely rendered. It certainly gives pause. My impression is of a summer evening, where all is not what it might appear to be. The form, itself, which – to my mind – resembles an arrow, can be taken as cupid’s arrow … or an arrow causing injury. The words ‘reeks in bliss’ present a similar dichotomy. Awesome – very clever – work here, Bjorn!
Beautifully done when the Tetractys.is extended this way. It flows naturally!
Also, I learned about a new form here.
Pingback: THE CHOICE – MY WALL·