It’s not stealing I had said —
I only need this win, and I will pay them back.
She won’t fight for custody; she’ll take me back.
This is the last straw —
Everything at once.
All I have on black.
One spin, I watch the ball tumbling.
Dizzy and transfixed, dancing on the precipice, I’m falling — landing hard:
Number twelve and red.
Everything turns black.
I’m caught; entangled — done.
They will come for me tonight.
They will devour me; skin me raw; let me burn.
I’ll be corpse to show what happens when you steal from them.
I thought about being caught in a spiderweb, and my thoughts went to be gambling. We now understand that gambling is a disease. Guess that you should have it treated before you steal money from the mob.
Friday Fictioneers write every week hundred words on the same image. Rochelle curates and keep us all in order. Check it out and join the fun.
Any chance he can get out the country and change identity in time? Well written.
Nope…. he’s caught in a web of his own making.
That was a vivid and well written story. Well done.
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
Thank you … 🙂
I enjoyed it! Liked the audio, too…what program(s) do you use?
Gotta say, I didn’t see that one coming…great!
Scott
Mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2018/01/10/welcome-to-my-parlor/
I use a program called Audicity to record, and I have actually bought a mic to record with… but I’m sure you can use the headset for a mobile phone.. the built in mic of the laptop is not good enough
Have a headset, thanks
I’m heading to Las Vegas tomorrow. I’ll keep this in mind. Ha ha
Tracey
I’m a Nevada girl so I don’t actually gamble and this is one reason why.
I think that stealing is never good… but sometimes jailtime is preferable… but best is not to gamble I think
Will you be wearing your Perry Block cheerleader outfit, Tracey?
Yes, with sequins because “what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas!”
Oh what webs and sticky messes we can create when we set out to deceive…
I think the web of gambling, booze and drugs are quite similar.
Interesting take. Such a great sense of being trapped and desperate, I could feel it!
Indeed… like a fly ready to be eaten
Definitely not the right ones to “borrow” from…
Ultimate ending…
It’s never right to “borrow”…. but given a choice i would avoid “them”
You and I both, Björn.
Superbly written. I could totally imagine this
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Thank you
It seems that the poor chap just gambled his life away!
I’m afraid death will not come instantly
i think he’s doomed. he better take as a man and make his exit as painless as possible.
Better to jump from a window than wait for “them”…
Just one more spin, I’ll win it back this time… nice take.
My luck has to change sometimes… or next time.
Interesting where the prompt took you this week, Bjorn. Nicely done.
You never know where the prompt will take you… sometimes I’m surprised myself
I liked the way you used staccato sentences to indicate his fragmented state of mind.
I think this is how fell… dancing on the edge.
A very good analogy, Bjorn. No way out.
Like a fly who get more and more entangled the more he tries to escape.
Flies are not lovable, but I feel sorry for them when they do that.
“Guess that you should have it treated before you steal money from the mob.” Haha Wise words, Björn, and a good tale to illustrate your point.
I think you should get treatment as early as possible…
Brilliant. Love it. People who gamble are so deluded. You story demonstrates so well the man’s desperation and his sorry fate. You can almost hear the clock ticking away towards his end, through your short, sharp sentences.
Not many moments left at the end.
I feel sorry for him even though he brought it on himself!
Me too… gambling is a disease.
Wow! No need for the explanatory note – your powerful words told the whole tale. Such vivid, visceral stufff – had me riding on a knife edge, waiting for that ball to fall. Great story
I think the odds where not there to begin with
Gambling addiction can destroy lives, so a this was an excellent take on the prompt. Liked the audio too.
Thank you… I have started to feel more and more confident with recording.
That writing was like a thrill ride. Well done.
Thank you… enjoy the ride
Good advice! =) I always enjoy your stories, they captivate me from the start.
Thank you Brenda… i try different styles from time to time.
Next time, next time… never. Brilliant
Click to read my FriFic!
There is always a next spin.. until all is lost.
Dear Björn,
This piece, coupled with your brilliant reading, is amazing. Terrific message. Great take on the prompt.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you… thinking myself as the fly made me think of what could tie you so… Reading it aloud has become a nice addition for me.
And for the rest of us. 😉
Outstanding piece, Bjorn. Graveyards and homeless shelter are filled with people who were addicted to this awful disease. An occasional win fed the fire until at last the fire consumed them.
Indeed… I always keep far away from gambling.
Great story/poem, Bjorn. Excellent take on the prompt.
Thank you… tried to see it from the trapped fly’s perspective.
I like the style and structure of this piece Bjorn. Gambling is not a pleasant past time when caught in its clutches.
Thank you.. gambling is terrible…
Oh, how terrifying! Very well done.
Thank you… I tried to find my own angle.
That is awesome. I read “All on Black”,,, then i did soundcloud. Man-oh-man Björn fantastic story. I had to reread story at your slower speaking pace,,,, Very nice, thanks for the extra element.
Thank you… when I first started recording it was a feedback I got… you must read much slower… and then I realized that the pace you read can (almost) always get slower.
A hard lesson to learn. You give us so much story and emotion in this -his defeat is total, he knows it and we feel his despair. So well done.
Gambling is a disease.. gambling celibacy is the only thing that works
That is a very interesting take on the photo this week! Very good story telling!
Thank you… I tried to work it more as metaphor
Well, Bjorn, I enjoyed the audio reading. Do you have the accent or was that a voice for the character? I enjoyed reading your story too. There’s more insight in hearing it read; especially, from the author, but I got the same thoughts when I read it. Interesting way to go with the prompt. I suppose a gambler (I don’t gamble – work too hard for my money to waste it) is caught in a web. The addiction must be to win win win more and more money. Well done ….
Isadora 😎
That’s definitely my accent… some days it might be a bit less thick, but no accent on purpose.
I’ve always enjoy listening to people who speak with accents. It’s captivating. Yours is quite enjoyable to listen to. Hope to hear some more of your readings. : )
love how you showed so much in the powerful opening-
we have the rationalizing away at the stealing – cos that is what happens – it sneaks up on them –
then you have the familial conflict
and lead it right into the addiction – well done
and side note – just heard on the radio about a movie called “molly’s Game”
“Molly Bloom’s former life as a “poker princess” in the secretive world of high-stakes poker is the basis of an Aaron Sorkin movie, “Molly’s Game.”
it sounds really good
I try to imagine how it is to be caught in that web… when you only see one way out
or no way out cos it is all webby and sticky
Caught in the web indeed… doesn’t sound like he has an escape
Probably missed the escape years ago.
This sounds like a type of mafia. You don’t steal from the big guys and they never let you leave once you’re caught up in it. It’s truly like a spider’s web. Good writing, Bjorn. —- Suzanne
Nope… you don’t even take a loan from them.
Good story, Bjorn. It’s so true. Those who get caught really do fall into a black mess.
Black as blood.
There ain’t no going back for him. Something for everyone in this dark story.
Everything has an end… also suffering (unless they skin him alive)
Gambling is terrible. Hope people don’t get trapped in its web.
I never ever gambled a day in my life or even thought about it and I never wish 2