Not a fairy tale

He rode the bike of twilight
when they met at dusk
She was blinded,
        blissed
groomed in grooves
of him and rock’n’roll.

She was a bombshell,
feisty
but made pill complacent —
when he broke her will.

She selected him,
she wanted night
and let him trade
her flesh for gasoline and highs
        of syringe sunshine
going west.

He pimped her, dumped her
somewhere far out west
and let her seek for deeper veins
with johns alone —
she needled deep to find her
        needless grave, as he rode on
to find another teen.

Picture by Sue Judd, used with permission.

Today we write poems including the word groove with Lillian at dVerse. I also promised Sue to write something to her picture. Something I “saw” just outside the frame of that parked motorbike.

December 12, 2017

42 responses to “Not a fairy tale

  1. Yuk! There’s such a thing as writing TOO well, you know! J/k – but you do make this sad tale horrifyingly convincing.

  2. Oh my. You weren’t kidding when you said you didn’t go the happy groovy route with this one. It is, though disturbing in content, very powerful. “Syringe sunshine” – what an amazing image that is. It belies the promise of brightness to the user….and then digs deep into the grooves of pain and brings the bottom of darkness.
    An amazing write. To get “into the reader” with such visceral content and get an emotional response — shows the power of your words, Bjorn.

  3. Now this piece hums with darkness, brother; put me in mind of a Jim Morrison lyric. You had me at /bike of twilight/ Also the word smithing smacked of Bukowski and Kerouac–sweet, sad and definitely groovy.

  4. I love it when you write from this place, in this voice.

    “made pill complacent”

    “She selected him,
    she wanted night
    and let him trade
    her flesh for gasoline and highs
            of syringe sunshine”

    “He pimped her, dumped her”

    Crazy good writing.

  5. I love story poems, and this is exceptional … dreadfully sad, but too often true. Inspired write, Bjorn!

  6. Great ability to draw in the reader, especially with the stanza that begins “she selected him” which gives great specifics and lets the reader see through her eyes in it’s disjointed structure. Nice, Bjorn!

  7. So many great images to make this dark story come to life.. sickening that this is still possible in this day and age. Very nicely written Bjorn.

  8. It made me think of a recent news story in the US, about an underage girl who was sent to jail for killing her pimp. So many small horrors all around us, but privilege keeps us from seeing them.

  9. There is a fine art to telling a story in poetic form and this achieves much that prose fails to do as it labours over details of time and place. You set the mood quickly and hint at details of plot and character. It left me to wonder about the lives of these two people, and the countless like them in the world.

  10. Predators come in all shapes and sizes and genders. Its not about the prey. They are a means to an end. What happens to them what they feel means little.

    Nice write. I could feel it coming subtly but good job on the reveal

  11. Some very compelling wordplay in this … bits of alliteration and chopped lines interspersed with long – to great effect, I think – creating a kind of broken ballad vibe, on which you’ve hung this ‘not a fairy tale’.

  12. Definitely not a fairy tale. You are so good portraying the miserable and melancholy in beautiful words. Really like the needless-needled wordplay at the end.

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