Translucent silver

My moon, translucent sweet
you — a bat-of-lashes fluent
heated temptress, silky empress.

You the teaser, freeze of sea,
you a pilferer of silver
river mirror
cross the midnight water.

I’m lost — a muted walker,
as your hands above,
are free, nocturnal birds
enchanter, haunter
with your melodies.
As you play your sitar,
with divine eternal cords.

Nocturne Grey And Silver by James McNeill Whistler

Nocturne Grey And Silver by James McNeill Whistler

Today Walter is tending the bar, and want us to consider rhymes at dVerse. I have tried to include as many as possible, still working with the moon. But if you want you can use the subject of autumn as well.

September 1, 2016

22 responses to “Translucent silver

  1. When I saw this was about the moon, I thought it would be for Tuesday’s prompt, but it only took me a couple of lines to realize what you were up to. The sounds in this are so good–it deserves to be read aloud, Bjorn.

  2. Clever use of rhyme; had to re-read it to get into the flow; nice work–mine was a bit more traditional–not used to working with rhyme.

  3. You’ve certainly gone to town on the rhyme, Bjorn! I love those lines:
    ‘heated temptress, silky empress’ and ‘You the teaser, freeze of sea,/
    you a pilferer of silver’. I had to read it aloud and roll the words around my mouth!

  4. I think the speaker is just going under, so his thoughts are a little loopy as he waits for the surgeon to cut him open. The line about hands made me think that.

    I love this.

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