22 responses to “Sevenling: (I see)”

1. Really like this…the last line was unexpected (as it should be), but completely in tune with the rest of your piece.

2. Love this…especially the fingers of shadow and the kelp clothed lady…awesome details in this sevenling!

3. AWE-SOME

   I love this line: “and your famous hands (smaller than than the rain)” … so gorgeous. … Also that last line, especially how it relates to the title and the opening, which makes YOU the (e)clair-voyant. 😉

   Ooh, love how “wicked” doubles as evil and candle-wicks burning. Also, liquid can be wicked; so why not fire? That’s when a fiery person touches other people and lets his/her fire seep onto/into them … which can be both good and bad, I suppose. Pleasurable *and* painful.

   Also, the way you broke the line after “fingered” makes this a little bit naughty. 😛

   • An ee cumming reference is always welcome

     • If you’re ee-ing, then anything goes. But do you mean to have repeated words here? …

       “(smaller than than the rain)”

     • Nobody (not even the rain) has such small hands

4. Wonderful imagery, Bjorn. ‘Hands smaller than rain’, for reasons I do not understand, is making the hairs stand up on the back of my neck. This woman is definitely bad. She’s a ‘kelpie’, mesmerising sailors and wrecking ships and a ‘belle dame sans merci’, mesmerising knights and abandoning them in the Val Sans Retour. It’s all in the hands, and I suppose raindrops can be as round as skulls and crystal balls. I’ve had a terrible draining week and your poem is welcome rain. Thank you. I must must must visit you more often. 🙂

   • The small hands is actually a wave at ee cummings and a poem called https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/somewhere-i-have-never-travelledgladly-beyond

     • Ah, just read the ee cummings. Thanks for the ‘heads-up’. The image is everything. I do love Imagism. I swear I’m the only person in the world who understands (and likes) The Red Wheelbarrow. 🙂

5. This has an ultra modern feel to it, Bjorn, quite sparse but with a concentration of imagery which works on an emotive level too.

   The clairvoyant plays the third to the dames and the sailor-lady very nicely.

6. Very cleverly executed with the word play. I love the mood set with it – mysterious and ambiguous.

7. Seductive and alluring with a hint of wry humour. An intriguing mix of tone and purpose.

8. So cute, the cummings increases the cute exponentially 🙂

9. Never trust her but still ask her. Wonderful mood and I love the kelpie hair and smaller hands.

10. This has a classic feel, and yet a modern vibe. A wonderful play with Eliot’s words. I bet that clairvoyant didn’t see this coming.

11. I enjoyed this so much, your lady is mysterious and captivating, trustful or not,,,,

12. Love the way that last line falls. Perfect for a sevenling. (Love that you’re still slinging sevenlings!) I think you have a double “than” in that second-to-last line? And you KNOW I love the nod to Cummings I see there. 🙂

    • Oops no more stuttering now

13. A lovely sevenling. Nice allusion to cummins. Such things can be hard to pull off, but this one arrived as a small rush of pleasant surprise, enhancing but not overwhelming your portrait of Madame Sosostris.

14. This seven long is a great form. I love your ending and the painting. So much to discover in your allusions. I read your point about writing a poem a day. Quite a challenge. Agree though that I find it difficult keeping up with reading all the great blogs out there. Will try with yours as you have such a creative and challenging way with words.

15. It has this romantic, seductive feeling until that last line. I totally didn’t expect it.

16. With just a dozen borrowed words, you’ve given us a whole new and exciting poem! I love the “hands smaller than rain.” There’s always something knowing about hands. Thanks for linking up. I hope my next prompt will not have such technical difficulties.

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