Constellations of your breath

I love you as the plant that never blooms
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers;
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance,
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

(Pablo Neruda Sonnet XVII:
I do not love you as if you were brine-rose, topaz)


You are the blessing of a summer rain
and in you voice is chlorophyll
the green before relentless drought;
you are the smell of seedpods saved;
stored away with sheltered lies.
You are the blushing of a smothered shame,
but still your presence in this room
are the torrential songs of jungle storms.
and in the presence of your hungry womb
I love you as the plant that never blooms.

Your hands have strength of open wings
prepared to flee the velvet claws
of hungry wolf-packs waiting;
wailing with the pregnant moon.
You are the silent silver spilled
as midnight oil on empty parking lots;
the blessing of the fading power
to moths around a lonely lamp,
I wait when darkness crumble towers
but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers.

To help me through this trembling night
you tether me with subtle chains
and with a whisper from your nimble hands;
I feel their gentle weight,
you are the kitten sleeping on my chest.
So, finally at break of dawn
in cleansing tears — a gentle cadence
stains — a map to guide my day.
Your breath has been my guidance
thanks to your love a certain solid fragrance

in the constellations of your heaving chest
that lead me cross the thirsty waters;
through vastness of uneasy seas.
My eyes, not yet acquainted with this sullen dawn,
are unwilling yet to leave,
this instant just before our parting.
My fingers nesting oddly
bouncing like a fly against a window pane
awake you, and your smile is godly
risen from the earth, lives darkly in my body.

Early Morning Fog by Eyvind Earle

Early Morning Fog by Eyvind Earle



After the great glosa that Grace presented on Pretzels this Monday I felt I had to do another glosa for dVerse OLN hosted by Abhra later today. I took four lines from a wonderful sonnet by Pablo Neruda, and tried to weave some of his magic into my own creation. Come to the bar and present your own poem.
May 7, 2015

61 responses to “Constellations of your breath

  1. It is not often my head is snapped back and my breath stops – totally – when I read. This is magnificent, tender, true….I am just totally blown away. And then to listen to you read this. I hugged myself and wept at the beauty of this poem. Am I sounding crazed? probably and I apologize but this is truly magnificent. I am going to go and howl at the moon and then come back inside and think abit.

      • It really is an amazing form. I showed this to my husband. He does not usually respond to poetry but he read it twice. His usual response is a grunt. But this time he said, that is incredible and interesting about weaving in part of another’s poem. Your poem received more praise from him than any of mine! 🙂

  2. Incredible work; a new & sadly tender place you took us to, brother. The glosa seems flawless, flowing easily on the page. This romantic saunter feels ready to romp. I adore listening to your recitation; adds the next dimension to the experience. I like the lines /you are the silent silver spilled/as midnight oil on empty parking lots/.

  3. So many favourite elements of mine in this piece – loving the effect Bjorn – specially the chlorophyll.

  4. A lovely theme going through all your poetry this week – the glosa, the poets who inspire you and then this as the apogee of all your efforts! This is truly stunning, hypnotic, dream-like – it certainly has the same effect on me as Neruda’s poetry.

  5. Bjorn, I think this is my favorite poem of yours in recent times. It has a beautiful flow and terrific metaphors. Makes my heart sing!

  6. Oh very beautiful very sensual – and your reading just adds to the magic Björn. Love it love it love it!
    Anna :o]

  7. This line blow me away.

    “You are the blushing of a smothered shame,
    but still your presence in this room
    are the torrential songs of jungle storms.
    and in the presence of your hungry womb
    I love you as the plant that never blooms.”

    wow!!! what inspired you to write this beautiful poem?

    I love it very much. Your visions are always brilliantly crafted and surreal. 🙂

  8. Stunning and absolutely exquisite..but my favorite line, though so hard to pick just one, is, “the green before relentless drought.” That is utterly glorious. I have never heard of glosa. Thanks for the amazing introduction 🙂

  9. This poem is exquisite Bjorn, both in glosa form and meaning ~ The rhyming is subtly done and I really admire these lines:

    I wait when darkness crumble towers
    but carries in itself the light of hidden flowers.

    One of you best writing & I enjoyed the read too, smiles ~

  10. Your voice is as strong as ever Bjorn in this very rich piece and a joy too to have access to your reading – but I hear your voice anyway, when I read your stuff – so distinctive… With Best Wishes

  11. Wonderful glosa Bjorn! It takes efforts to come up with an extensive offering of a glosa. It creates a fullness of a poem and you’ve done it very well!

    Hank

  12. It’s a glosa! I love glosas! And oh my stars what a beautiful one. I read this last night as I was going to bed. Your words left me speechless in its beauty I couldn’t comment. Oh, but I could not let today pass and NOT comment. Your exquisite rhymes, the depth of mood, this is easily one of your best that I’ve read. Magnifico Björn, I’m still in awe of this.

  13. It does have an outer-world feel to this piece yet, at the same time, it is also very here and now… sent my mind (and heart) all over.
    (I wish my computer weren’t missing the part that enables listening).

  14. How beautiful it is to weave the love of human.. in nature and the parking lots of modern culture.. the same.. wherever eyes of love exist.. the environment no matter what.. can become a song of love and worded bliss..:)

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