A bundle of carnations.

· by · in poetry, rhymes. ·

A processed carnation from flickr

A processed carnation from flickr



The red cloth around her bundle, a burden
tied carefully around what’s left of life,
she’s turned collateral, fleeing mortar serpents,
a sacrifice to threat of unsheathed knifes,
She could have chosen survival as servant
to the charcoal banners of bearded tyranny
of desert trucks and murderous villainy.

Her blistered feet have kissed the village ash
of daughters raped and killed, when desert cries
to righteous hands, relentless men of Daesh.
She left behind her blood to lidless eyes,
of solitude to dust of this despairing dash
across the plains to havens of starvation
with life a bundle colored as carnations.

Just as she becomes another number
of empty ragdolls who’s forced to giving up
and withers, merging with the desert umber.
Your morning coffee turning cold, a coupe
de grace to bless your daylight slumber
in dreams of rapid reincarnations
for bundled lives colored in carnations.

Linked to Real Toads where Margaret is recycling some old prompts. My choice fell on Firblossom’s Rhyme Royal. I cannot get out of my head the horrible things happening in the deserts of Syria. will also link this to Poets United
—
February 21, 2015

48 responses to “A bundle of carnations.”

  2. Bjorn, so powerful, and the closing lines knocked it right out of the park. On today’s news three teenage (15, 16 year old) Canadian girls are missing. They boarded a plane, thought to have been enticed as brides for ISIS men in Syria. They have no idea the world they will step into when they land.

  3. Your poem gives us a sense of the terror of this awful world situation, Bjorn. Your wording ‘another number of empty ragdolls’ really expresses the sad reality of the way it is. When will the ‘murderous villainy’ end? And how?

  5. i think i would rather not choose living and having to be subserviant….what a brutal situation to have to go through eh? the empty ragdolls was quite the powerful description…

  6. Horrible news about these women ~ that second stanza is just sharp and relentless as men from Daesh ~ Just another number, empty ragdoll, merging with desert umber ~

  7. It is horrible, the news there. Your verses are charged with heaviness and brutality, from the, “bundle, a burden” to the blood and bloodlessness and colors or red and ocher. The carnation symbol is unexpected and so effective.

  8. I hate how every day seems to bring more horrific news from Syria and its neighboring countries, as if cruelty and horror were limitless. I was quite heartened however by the news of the Muslims in Oslo protecting the synagogue there.

  9. Important not to turn away from such images! I like the way you used the form to create a narrative, its traditional use.

  11. a burden tied carefully around whats left of life – It just seems like WWII all over again, such insane disregard of life – FOR WHAT? Such hatred is unfathomable to me, yet it is life day in and day out for these people – we will all be involved sooner or later … I’m sure they can’t understand why the world isn’t doing something about it. I guess they are -they are turning off the tv and radios.

    A very hard poem to read.

  13. you are doing the right thing at the right time…hope we could all raise our voices against such atrocities and make them heard…sigh……I feel ashamed to call myself a human…telling imagery….

  16. i can feel their pains through your poem. sometimes i tried to avoid reading the news but I know i have to, to be more aware of what’s happening in the world.

    that ragdoll line is heartbreaking. they are powerless like the dolls.

  17. Sobering…and three more young flowers heading to Syria from the UK..even if they are found and returned I suspect their lives will be changed irrevocably…

  18. Mankind throughout the ages has shown itself to be inhumane. We fear difference and either shun it or destroy it. In so many parts of the world integration is possible but elsewhere fear, cruelty and death is again ascending. But as we shout out against it even some of our own fear repercussions for such action.

  20. Magnificent! You are a most skillful writer of form poetry – never forgetting that the most important part of it is content, with structure providing the frame. This is a moving tribute to life and loss, with strong word choices and use of colour throughout.

  21. I think I know why you couldn’t get it out of your head… you needed to tell the poetry world… lovely write… “Her blistered feet have kissed the village ash” what a beauty line… nice job

  22. She could have chosen survival as servant
    to the charcoal banners of bearded tyranny
    of desert trucks and murderous villainy.

    Your powerfully gripping words have provided an equally dynamic visual, reminiscent of those we have witnessed on worldwide screens, as of late. A timely observation of an escalating emergency, that has yet to be treated effectively, it seems.

    Poppy

  26. Good to bring it up! There are those not bothered with dignity of human lives. Others are just collateral damage to be noted in terms of numbers but not in terms of deaths!. Great lines Bjorn!

    Hank

  28. So grueling, yet full of color and emotion, the carnations, or their color, such a vivid vehicle for the narrative, the redness of the blood spilled, the red eyes from weeping, desert dust, all of these. The form’s repetition just emphasizes the feel of a desperate fleeing, one foot after another through the dry sand. Very compelling write of conscience Bjorn..

  34. oh, you break my heart, Björn! wonderfully, powerfully written but such a tragic story… i don’t understand humanity, i really don’t.

  35. Bjorn,
    your poem relates the reality we have nearly become accustomed to on our evening news. Watched, but not really digesting the horror that is reported. Perhaps we shield our eyes to the full story of the suffering which is taking place, a few hours flight from our homelands. An enlighting and sympathetically written piece…
    Eileen

  37. Describing the tragedy I like how you bring closer to us the ‘ empty ragdolls’, ‘Your morning coffee turning cold’ …you put carnations in visual row of tyranny underlining our blessed peace and dreams…powerful voice!

  38. It’s hard to fathom what humans are capable of doing. I can feel the weight in your beautifully heartbroken words. Very powerful, indeed, Bjorn.

  40. Nicely written for the times, Bjorn. This is so terrible, the atrocities that the Daesh are guilty of. Shades of Nazi times. I am glad you called them by their descriptive name, “Daesh”.
    ..

  43. Hey Bjorn–the bundle of all belongings especially vivid and real to me, and you carry out the form very skillfully. It is a terrible situation. thanks. k.

  44. it’s hard to write about such things, but you managed it in your powerful poem, without the vitriol.
    “empty ragdolls“, that’s really a lasting image.

  45. I think even in the middle of all that is horrible, there is still beauty, and it seems you seek it in your piece…the beauty of the red carnations. How do we make any sense of this?

Leave a reply to jazzbumpa Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.