
Summer Breeze by Erte
The summer breeze that kisses you, don’t ask
he takes whatever he might want and leaves
he takes and goes away and you’re deceived
unfaithfulness is just his bashful task
The summer breeze will hide behind his mask
belonging to the staff of Amor’s thieves
deserted autumn comes and you will grieve
lamenting, drinking from a bitter flask
The summer breeze that linger on your lips
leaves memory of roses in your mouth
The summer breeze will keep you in his grip
but he has left for countries further south
The summer breeze like honey on your hips
he’s gone forever – your deceitful spouse
—
I have never written for Real Toads before, but a Sonnet challenge I just had to take, and I have never written Petrarchan before (a few slanted rhymes …)
June 7, 2013
I so love every every word you have written here & hope that the deceit of a summer breeze kisses my lips :)))) this is JUST BEEutiful x
Thank you .. 🙂
The summer breeze is indeed deceitful, especially here. It’s great one day, and like a convection oven the next. Your poem made me think of its better times.
Oh yes… today we have real summer here. Really a little bit too warm…
You couldn’t resist a sonnet challenge, smiles ~ That summer breeze refrain works so well, but goodbye to that deceitful spouse ~ Excellent job on the rhyming pattern, like that second stanza best ~
And thanks for linking up with Real Toads ~
I really couldn’t avoid to write a new sonnet. and using a little anaphora as well… It’s actually inspired by a poem by Swedish poet Hjalmar Gullberg.
Bjorn, thank you for your participation on our RT Sunday challenge. Your Petrarchan sonnet is faultless, and if you have never written one before, I must say, you seem to have fallen into a form which fits your style 100%
The call to summer-time with a ‘short lease’ is made with an intensity of emotion, very apposite to the style of classical sonnets. Your rhymes are well-chosen without being overly exact. I like the way mouth, south and spouse sound together. Very well done.
I have written quite a few sonnets before (actually three this week) but I found this a challenging rhyme-scheme.
Very nicely done!! You are so handy with these sonnets!
Thank you Misky.. sometimes they come easily. and I learn constantly.
Bjorn, it is just terrific. “The summer breeze that lingers on your lips/leaves memory of roses in your mouth.” Love the whole thing and that line especially.
Thank you 🙂 I enjoy writing iambic pentameter when not doing haiku… I think I will combine them one day.
the 2nd stanza especially stands out for me, Bjorn. Great imagery ~ M
Thank you 🙂
You cannot be serious, Bjørn. The fondness of God is not deceiving.
My sonnet had nothing to do with God… sorry if you have misunderstood that.
Great work with the form, and a really enjoyable read.
Thank you 🙂
I am indeed impressed! YOu really did get the form just right and it read well too. Excellent.
Thank you 🙂
Welcome.. I have never read the seasons referred to as “he” and I love it! Summer breezes are splendid, but a Fall breeze … that leaves me undone – the smell, the coolness. Yes, I’m a “northerner” 🙂 I had to laugh, though, as summer is fickle indeed, heading south, often without a backward glance. I remember often, in Michigan, we would have a week of autumn and then POOF, ol’ man winter. Not so fond of him. Anyway, great poem, you are very talented.
I kind of wrote the summer breeze as a deceitful lover
This is excellent!! So many tangible tastes and mood producing images!!
Thank you 🙂 I love writing
I love to see those words!!! That needs to be a bumper-sticker and a T-Shirt….a mug….probably already is…but anyway, me too, I ♥ Writing!!
Really great form here, Bjorn–the balanced cadence works really well with the images you present, which reminded me a bit of cards being turned over, one at a time, in a fortune telling atmosphere–and your personification of the breeze is flawless here…good to see you at real toads.
Thank you.. I really couldn’t stop myself from another sonnet. 🙂 I think I might be an occasional visitor…
Love your sonnet … also enjoyed reading you wrote of the ‘summer breeze as a deceitful lover’ (I agree.)
Or a deceitful as a summer breeze…
Wow, this is really good, perfect in sonnet form and topic! 🙂
Thank you 🙂
Oh dear – hard to think of summer leaving already, but it is certainly true that just as summer feels that it’s hear to stay it leaves. A great deal of music here. k.
Summer is always a brief visitor in our places …