43 responses to “In an alley lost”

1. I love all the sounds, specially the last part, the sounds of the homeless hiss vs the skylarks singing. Thanks for reminding us how amazing sounds can be in our poem.

   • I remember the fun of doing this the last time, so I thought it would be a good repetition.

2. Interesting, this is new to me. I like it!

   Pat

   • Sound in poetry is fun… and many “real” words grows from this.

3. This is gorgeously rendered, Bjorn! I especially like this part; “in childhood meadows skylarks sing preet-preet-preet-la-preet.” I can almost hear them 💙💙

   • Thank you… yes we should be able to hear them.

4. love the sounds in this does make me think of London when I visit.

   • Cities have all those sounds… and there is so much wer can do.

5. I like the way you filled the alley with sounds, Björn, and the phrase ‘extending manhood filling streets’ made me chuckle. I like the ‘sleekness of a fender painted blue while sea and sky are growing greyer, greyer’ and the skylarks singing in childhood meadows.

   • There is some story in all the sound I think

6. an eco poet! a sheer cacophany of contrasts

   and ” sanctuary coffins” really strikes a chord

   • Thank you… those little green patches in city is really very small.

     • the Victorians made sure there were lots of them in Central London for the health of the people – almost by accident they created a corridor of green which in turn benefits nature to some extent

7. This poem is a fight, but as it shows..one voice against a cacophony of noise….as always tension in your words, in this greying world.

   • I tried to be a voice for our own dystopia, yours with all the sound of wars would be so much harder to handle I think… so well done in your poem, that sadness (and maybe the worst sound of war is silence)

8. My father loved cars when I was growing up. Your poem reminds me of him. Thank you!

   • So many men love their cars… that is how it is, glad to be able to remind you.

9. Good graphic to represent the concepts in the poem.

   • Thank you… sometimes it works with AI

     • You’re welcome.

10. A great poem, Bjorn. I loved this line….

    scents of bloom
    are strangled, stretched
    and squeeeeezed
    into sanctuary coffins
    we call parks.

    I thought at first you were going for a church funeral.

    • It is a kind of funeral for nature maybe.

      • Yes that would work.

11. This poem is so visually strong and the sound effects and amazing

    • Sounds are fun to add to with poems.

      • Yes the add music and rhythm to the poetry

12. So sad and unsettling, Björn, and the sounds add to the effect.

    • Maybe we should feel that noise is part of our polution… just as artificial light.

13. Wow another poem that makes us think about how we treat this world. I loved the sounds and invented words…I love to do that, though not this time though. My favourite verse is

    While tweets of birds
    and scents of bloom
    are strangled, stretched
    and squeeeeezed
    into sanctuary coffins
    we call parks.

    Sanctuary coffins I think will stay with me….it is so true!

    • We keep patches of nature alive … maybe seeing them as coffins will help us understand.

14. A rise and fall of sound, cityscape as soundscape searching for escape.

    • Thank you… sound and cities goes together…

15. This is indeed a dire soundscape you create here Björn and very onomatopoetic…

    • Thank you… the citiscape is also a soundscape

16. Love this! Like the other Kim, the manhood comment made me chuckle. The duality of the end – at least for me – of the end of days for an individual, and end of days for us all, was sobering and on point. Like Laura said, this is an eco-poem – and a good one.

    • The irrationality of driving a car and enjoying is feels like such a male thing.

17. A touch of Springsteen to this, Bjorn! Great stuff! Jim

    • Thank you, that is high praise indeed.

18. Chock full of sounds. Luv it.

    Thanks for dropping by to read mine

    Much♡love

19. in childhood meadows
    skylarks sing
    preet-preet-preet-la-preet.

    I love that you chose to end the poem on this sound bite.

20. A splendid poem, Bjorn. I love onomatopoeia and use it often.

21. Pingback: Roberta Writes – d’Verse, Meet bar soundly with Onomatopoeia #songparody·

22. The opening stanza captured the sounds of cities so aptly. “Sanctuary coffin” is a brilliant description. If only we did not have to go back to childhood to hear the skylark sing!

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