Forgotten and lost, Julie walks along the frozen dirt road. With soles worn thin each stone hurts, and the claws of the icy wind find the rips in her old parka.
She tries to remember them, their smiling faces, the ones who called her a friend, but she has obliterated all of the names.
Swallowed up by the cold, is the awareness of Jake, of the rage and obsession they called love until it wasn’t.
She has hiked since sunrise, having left the relative comfort of shelter under a spruce. She carries food and water, and somewhere ahead there is a convenience store where she can refill her supplies.
She sees the dust cloud before she spots the familiar pickup. The one she had paid for but was never allowed to drive.
She steels herself to say no, but she knows she will not.
Today I host Prosery at dVerse and the pub opens at 3 PM EST, remember that US has gone to daylight savings time so it will be one hour early.
Today I have selected this line from Tomas Tranströmer’s poem “After Someone’s death”:
all of the names swallowed up by the cold
If you join for the first time, Prosery is a piece of prose of no more than 144 words including the given line.
March 11, 2024
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Perhaps she will make it somewhere warm and ditch Jake.🙏🏻
Jake will always find her.
😱
Such an excellent use of the line….split into two sentences. The piece is visceral….I feel for her.
She can never really leave.
This is incredibly potent! I can feel the “claws of the icy wind,” and relate to “the rage and obsession they called love until it wasn’t.” I too feel for her and hope she overcomes her pain.
Alas I feel that the pain is about to catch up with her.
I hope she will be OK, but I’m not sure she will be.
I think it will be worse before it gets better at least.
I fear that, too.
Such a powerful story and also so many terms used that are perfect as metaphors! Great writing.
Thank you… I enjoyed writing it.
You’re welcome.
intriguing. Maybe the dust cloud will swallow her up and take her to another planet.
much♡love
I fear that Jake is there in dustcloud to swallow her again
There’s no ditching Jake, no atter how long he’s been gone…
Gret write, Bjorn; and THANKS for hosting with such a cool prompt.
Indeed… this was exactly what I thought. Ironacally I was at a play yesterday which was all about coersive control…
So absorbed by the story was I, that I didn’t spot the quoted sequence. Had to go back and hunt for it! Great atmospheric writing…
Thank you… I think this is the real challenge to embed the quote into your own prose.
A chilling reality for this woman…you told her story well!
I fear that this is a reality for so many women.
A really great story. So sad, when she can’t say no to her bad situation.
It is all too common, it is called coersive control.
Yes, we had a neighbor like that, who stayed with him until he died.
We really want to root for your main character and you have us hoping she makes it farther and farther each time she boldly steps out on her own. So well done.
I hope so too.
She should have said no! Oh dear…
She will never say no (until it is too late)
Ouf, this is truly visceral, and alas, she will never be free of Jake
I don’t think so either.
Great piece of writing. I think you’ve captured the cold the way your poet laureate would have. This could go on you know….into a short story or even more.
I think so too… so many things people can be controlled by.
I hope she really gets the courage to say no, this time.
I feel that she will not.
I know this woman. Like many of us, I’ve been this woman. Great job with the line and with the feeling of hope surrounded by despair and giving up.
I am sorry to hear that you recognize yourself… too many of us men cannot handle themselves.
Stunning piece, Björn. I especially ‘liked the claws of the icy wind‘; the imagery here is fantastic.
Thank you for this prompt today.
I tried to imagine her walking by herself…
It’s amazing what one can and will do when spurred on by desperation, isolation and fear.
The anticipation of encountering the familiar pickup and the internal conflict – knowing she should say no but realizing she won’t – is so good! It hints at the complexity of her emotions…
~David
and maybe also a touch of fear….
Oh! These guys never give up, do they. Wonderfully written, Björn!
Thank you…. they seen so secure but are afraid and insecure.
Yes, sadly. And often with good reason to be afraid. Your young lady being proof.
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A very moving story Bjorn
I’ve encountered a few Julies and jakes in my time, moths to the flame, this paints the desperation of that particular attraction/addiction?
Alas they do seem all too common
Feel for Julie.. and hoping she learns to say NO…