The salmon sky foretells of darkness soon to choke my heart with tentacles of terror.
A moonless heaven offer no protection.
I shiver… not from cold as hurried trickle of small nocturnal creatures forebears the glowing eyes, soon to fill my night with dread..
The woodpile isn’t high enough to keep me sane… but I have promises to keep.
“One night alone”, she’d said. “Prove yourself”.
Is it worth insanity? After all she’d only told me “Maybe… ”.
Panicking I watch the desert turning darker.
I hurry back to the motel room.
”At least you tried”, she says kissing me welcome.
© Renee Heath
I saw the sunset and imagined having to stay out a night with all the sounds of night surrounding me. I think I would have loved it, but my narrator is more of a coward.
Friday Fictioneers is a group of bloggers finding stories in the same picture. Hundred words and not more. Rochelle curates and guides us to make sure we follow all the rules, check her site for instructions and other stories.
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January 30, 2019
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Nicely done!
Thank you
nice that she foregave him
I think she was just teasing him for his fear of darkness… city boy meets country girl
Cthulhu will wait for another chance to claim.
https://stuartnager.wordpress.com/2019/01/30/t-p-fridayfictioneers/
I think he only imagined monsters actually… a little wimp of a man
Lovely use of words to create a mood!
Thank you… the mood was fear of darkness 😉
What an interesting story! It’s an awful long time since I last read a story where a woman sends her romantic pursuer on a quest to win her hand in marriage. But yours is a distinctly modern telling, with a cowardly hero, primarily interested in sex, failing and yet being forgiven. Really nice piece of writing Bjorn!
I thought it funny to imagine a guy afraid of darkness… and at least trying for the sex :-)…
Aww yes at least he tried. I love your first sentence, by the way! “salmon sky”, “tentacles of terror” -> awesome imagery!
I saw the salmon sky in the picture and thought of darkness coming next…
Sometimes, trying is enough.
Probably her purpose all along…
Ah, good story – I wasn’t expecting that ending!
Susan A Eames at
Travel, Fiction and Photos
I had another ending in mind… but I liked this the best.
At least he was willing to try. She must have known that it was beyond his comfort zone and appreciated his effort!
Exactly… and also maybe took a little bit of his bloated pride away…
Wait. He couldn’t even make it a night and she doesn’t mind? She’s a sweetheart.
He couldn’t even get to darkness…
Sounds like a haunted seaside to me. I don’t think he was a wimp; I think he legitimately had a reason to be scared.
I was thinking desert filled with snakes and lizards…
You carried us along on his panic-stricken adventure. I love the phrase “kissing him welcome.” And i wonder if the woodpile had any significance? I did not understand that line–“the woodpile isnt high enough to keep me sane”. But chopping wood is not something we frequently do, in Florida. 😊
I was thinking that he didn’t have enough firewood to last the night.
it was a test. he didn’t pass. still, she welcomed him with open arms. well, that’s what you call love. 🙂
Maybe the true test was to admit he couldn’t do it.
He’s lucky she’s so magnanimous 🙂
Maybe he is… she might have a few more tricks up her sleeve
He tried. She accepted his efforts. That’s nice – although she does seem to be keeping her options open. Lovely imagery.
For the uninitiated staying overnight in a desert can be scary. You probably did the right thing. At least you are alive. Importantly, she understood.
He’s not the outdoorsy type, evidently. At least he got points for trying!
Elegantly constructed and atmospheric tale, Bjorn, I like it a lot.
Wonderful choice of words in your story!
He tried and he was rewarded… I’m glad for him 🙂
A very entertaining story. I could imagine his fear, a non-outdoorsy guy experiencing the sounds of the night all by himself. Well, okay, that would be me too. I always enjoy your prose so much! =)
Given a tepee and a fire, I’d have stayed!
Very lovely.
At least he got a good reception after he flunked out. And happy birthday for yesterday – I had limited connectivity so couldn’t wish you on time.
At least he tried, that tells us more about the man. There are many who wouldn’t even try, me included.
Sounds like heaven to me, but we’re all different.
Click to read my FriFic tale!
Yellow Chicken!! Love it, the idea of his girlfriend challenging him makes for great reading, I think their life will go back to how it was before; Humdrum!
We always tend to fear what we don’t understand. I didn’t grow up in the woods. Terry did. He’d “camp” with nothing but a blanket to wrap up in if it gets cold. Me? I want a flush toilet, private not public, and protection from tigers and lions and bears, OhMY!
Our compromise was a small camper that hooked up to our station wagon. I had my comfort, and he had his woods.
Dear Björn,
At least he tried to do something that terrified him. That’s hard. Well done and a happy belated birthday. Afraid this week has been a crazy busy one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
I especially liked the adjectives in the opening –
😉
And happy belated bday
At least the welcome was warm and not frosty. Otherwise he’d have to take his chances in the dark. Loved the poetic start to the story.
interesting take
Beautiful. I like that she is welcoming him back with love. I love to be outside with someone, but not alone.
Glad that she welcomed him!
Motel room is more comfortable 🙂
Red-Hot Show – Anita
Nice use of ‘salmon’ and ‘tentacles’ as imagery.
A gem of a story – very atmospheric in creating the desert at night, and as others have said, a role reversal challenge. Phew – glad it had a happy ending.
All those creepy unknown sounds can be disturbing.
Nicely written,Björn. An interesting use of the photo prompt. Your first line is poetically descriptive.
Isadora 😎
Brave one aren’t you? Believe me, you’ll never find me alone in the desert on purpose.
I can empathize. My imagination runs away from me at night. Out in the desert it is amplified–– so many sounds!
Cute story. I really enjoyed the ending.