Johnny’s gone

As soon as the last guest left Clara locked the door and meticulously cleaned the bar. She washed the glasses and swept the floor.

Thirty minutes later she left her apron on a hook, grabbed her handbag and walked the few blocks to the harbor. She quickened her pace when she saw the familiar silhouette of “Aurora”.

She hailed the first mate:

“Steve, tell Johnny I’m waiting”.

Clara knew from his silence.

“Was it the fever or a fight?”

“Sorry, Johnny stayed in Valparaiso… his wife became pregnant”.

“Me too”, she thought.

The harbor made me think of the waiting of every sailor’s sweetheart waiting for a ship to come in.

I’m back to writing after a short break, and took the simple way of writing a simple story this time. Friday Fictioneers is a group of bloggers who tirelessly write hundred word stories to a new picture every week. Rochelle selects the picture and set the example in how fiction should be written.



July 25 2018

42 responses to “Johnny’s gone

  1. Beautifully crafted, Bjorn, the almost mundane detail leading us right into the denouement.
    And a life is shattered.

  2. Dear Björn,

    You’ve crammed so much story into few words. Well done, although I’d love to add a few choice words about Johnny which brain he thinks with. Good to have you back amongst us sir.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  3. I don’t know why, but this one made me really sad — it’s probably the combination of already having such an emotional day and also having been a single mother, once upon a time.

    I don’t know how you got this story from that picture. You have such a vivid imagination.

  4. Some guys just can’t seem to tie a knot in it. And some girls forget to protect themselves. Sad for everyone, this one.

  5. Oh dear, I wonder how many other sprogs he has spawned in other ports around the world. That’s a neat bit of writing. I’ve not posted much on FF lately, partly because of intermittent writer’s block and partly because I love being out of doors in the sunshine. Doubtless I’ll return when the days are long and grey once more.

  6. Bjorn, welcome back. Sounds like somebody should be keeping track of all his progeny before you end up with a tragedy of Shakespearian proportions when two of his children fall in love and are about to marry when Johny recognizes his lost love.
    Nicely crafted and I also enjoyed the banter throughout the comments.
    Best wishes,
    Rowena

  7. Simple stories are the best. A sad situation, it looks like Johnny’s ship has sailed away forever. Also welcome back, it seems we both took a break.

  8. I love the way you tell this story, Bjorn. The meticulous way Clara completes her daily tasks really builds our anticipation. You expertly hint at her eagerness to be about her own business, while at the same time she feels constrained to do everything properly.
    You give us a nice twist at the end, and it left me, for one, wanting more – much more! Somehow I can see Clara coping as a single mum, and raising a great kid!

  9. A girl in every port? I wonder how many other little Johnnies there might be running around. Clara’s resignation was palpable and sad.

  10. The name Carla reminds me of the waitress from the series ‘Cheers’ I even see some character resemblance through the last line.

  11. It would be interesting to see what happens when Johnny returns, years later and finds his ex-lover with a child. Would he make the connection? Probably not.. doesn’t seem too smart. Welcome back!

  12. Clara doesn’t show any surprise when she learned about the wife. Maybe, she went into the relationship fully knowing that she’d be facing disappointment?

  13. Oh it seems like the situation has become extremely complicated with her. Nice take on the prompt. Makes you think who would Johnny go with, his lawful wife or the protagonist of the story with whom we are more familiar.

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