How the wayward wind is let || to whirl your golden hair
When not even moon can move you || I´m a mortal to your gaze
You’re its raven — racing || a mariner, the wind is yours.
Oh enigma of this envy why? || It’s not enough to hold you close
when that wayward wind is let || to whisper lies to starving ears.
My dear, I cannot capture you || the way you’ve caught my heart.
Love, enslave me, end my pain || I can’t endure this wind & you.
Windflowers by John William Waterhouse
Today I host the bar at dVerse, and I would like you concentrate on pauses and silence in poetry. My choice has been to include ceasuras (||) in my alliterative verse, but you are free to use punctuation or linebreaks to get the drama with those pauses that are crucial for poetry.
It would please me if you would include a reading so it becomes clear how you work with silence in your poem.
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January 4, 2017
Such a lovely piece, Björn, that goes so well with the picture you selected. There were so many great lines, and really from beginning to end, it flowed so well. I picked out this line though “to whisper lies to starving ears” because it caught my ear as a truth that’s phrased in a new way. Well done.
If you would like to play… my prompt on silence in poetry goes up in just a few minutes… I really think more and more of how silence can be used in a text.
I recently heard that punctuation is subliminal, and I thought how it’s even more true in poetry. It creates these spaces of silence that emphasis different parts of a poem. It sounds like a good challenge!
indeed, silence in poetry, as in music, can enhance the work as a whole…or highlight shorter portions within. Lovely piece, Bjorn!
Great to see you… hope you can participate.
I’ll see if I have time. For whatever reason, life has seemed busier than usual these last few months…and I don’t like to post if I won’t have time to read at least the poems of those who read my work…if not a few more!
Ha.. yes our lives can run into those rushes without a pause.
Lovely poem, Bjorn. I’ll have to think about the silences though.
I think you can take any poem and think about the silence in them and make them visible.
You’re probably right. I tend to see the silences as being an integral part of the words. It’s hard to add to that.
Punctuation is one way… maybe formatting… there are many ways to show it.
I see what you’re getting at. It isn’t something I’ve thought about before.
The use of caesura is very clear, Bjorn, and the personification of the wind is effective – I’ve experienced some high winds first-hand today and can still hear it roaring outside.I love the gorgeous image.
I actually went back to some early forms to include explicit ceasuras …
yee gods, this is fantastic!
Thanks 🙂
This is beyond gorgeous. I’m captivated by the idea of windflowers.
This is my favorite part:
“I´m a mortal to your gaze
You’re its raven”
I like the contrast between the golden hair and what I presume is raven/black hair. It makes me wonder if there are two girls — or one girl with two “heads.” I don’t know; lots of possibilities.
The aural readings are really amping up your work. I hope the others will follow suit.
I thought more of the raven as it flies than its color… but I can see the contradiction.
We’ll, the girl in the pic has black hair.
True… hmm
Big fan of the spoken word and you do that part so well, Bjorn! Those last two lines just captured me, especially in hearing them. The use of ceasuras in written poetry is a lost part of the art – I appreciate that you revived it for your poem.
I tried to approach it as an old alliterative poem… and midline caesura is a great challenge to use to balance a poem.
Must try it – I have not written in that style, but studied Middle English lit in college; I needed you to come along and suggest doing it myself.
We did a prompt on it a few years ago…
Well-written, well read! Your mastery of Caesura is on full display!
Thank you… I thought it would be fun to use a form that actually uses the caesura.
There is much that is familiar in your poem, and much that pulls at the heart. The silences pull us along….
Thank you Charley… I think that those old forms still can teach us something
Indeed. We can always learn from those who have gone before.
I like alliterative verse, reminding me of Beowulf. Nice audio.
You saved the best alliteration until the last line–enslave, end, and endure. Nice work, the full impact of the caesura if really felt here.
Nice! It was interesting hearing it read outloud. Nice work Björn.
Beautifully moody! I love the wayward wind repetition and the last line is sublime!
‘wayward wind is let || to whisper lies to starving ears’…this got me. But i would like to urge everyone to listen on sound cloud…perfectly done!
I love hearing this. I think for me reading it is different. But I am not familiar with this. I tried one, but ….
I love your reading of the poem! You definitely have some Shakespeare DNA!!
Dwight
This was absolutely beautiful, one can feel the depth of love and pain.
Beautiful words, delightfully designed.
Beautiful poem…charismatic poem!
Can’t escape that wayward wind…and the wind has its own way of silences for sure. (K)
For me, those whispers of the wind, the silences, speak to that love that can’t ever be fulfilled. They produce longing, sadness. Very effective with a classical feel. Someday, perhaps, I will figure out how to record and post my poems. Sigh.