A wanton moon

This wanton moon that makes me crave
your innocence of marble nape
my hands are ice, come be my slave
I’ll steal your softness in my cape.

I lust for wildness of pulsating veins
I need to quench my thirst for blood
Please, still your heart to break my chains
Please, sacrifice your livelihood.

Please, let me wind your golden hair
around my fist and bend you back
sweet maiden say your evening prayer
I love your scream as night turns black.

And when your life has slipped away
eternity will come to stay.

It’s been a while since I wrote of form poem for Friday Fictioneers. This is a tetrameter sonnet but I hope it works for a vampire story.

Rochelle selects the picture, we write. This poem will be linked to dVerse OLN as well, the bar opens at 9 PM CET tomorrow. Any one poem is welcome.

June 14, 2017

69 responses to “A wanton moon

  1. A dark poem indeed, Björn. I suspected an alluring vampire tale was unfolding with the line “your innocence of marble nape.” Good piece.

  2. Oooohhh… very Anne Rice of you. She always had so much sexy with her vampires and you’ve done the genre a great honour. Loved it.

  3. Very well written, Bjorn and great to see a poem in here. I haven’t been writing much poetry lately and am doing much more flash, although that’s largely to prompts. I really love the flash format.
    xx Rowena

  4. “Please, let me wind your golden hair
    around my fist and bend you back”
    Ohhhhh I can feel him tipping her head back to bare her throat…
    visceral! Well done!

  5. Wow! A wanton moon and a marble nape! A vampire lover, no less! I love the darkness of this poem and the last lines seem to echo:
    ‘And when your life has slipped away
    eternity will come to stay’.

  6. I started reading and thought to myself: goodness, Bjorn has become rather mean and bloodcurdling since I last checked in with dVerse… took me a while to realise it was a vampire story. Mind you, I’m not sure that a vampire would say please at all…

  7. I’ve never written a vampire story but I have a good friend who does. She convinced me I was not equipped to be a vampire author. You, however have given us a chilling yet vivid story in a sonnet written in iambic tetrameter. Your disguise is unmasked. You are a true poet!

  8. My husband and I just saw the 1920’s version of Nosferatu at our local theater. A band called the Invincible Czars played a score they created to go with the film. Your piece reminded me of that fun evening. Thanks.
    So many great lines but this – still your heart to break my chains – is my favorite.

  9. My favorite sonnet of yours, brother. The narrative is not bogged down by either rhyme or form; excellent job–enjoyed it a lot.

  10. I believe I already gave this a “Hot DAMN!” in regards to the hair pulling but let me also mention the excellence of the following lines “Sweet maiden say your evening prayer, I love your scream as night turns black.” Love it.

  11. Wow. And I too thought of the “moon over Bourbon Street”…Nawlins is mos’ def a town for Vampires. They can be mean suckers….heh heh. But a wonderful passionate piece.

  12. Oooo, he’s horribly seductive. Well done, Björn.
    Why is it that vampires have such sex appeal, as I can’t think of anything sexy about having someone bite my neck and drain me of blood? And yet, we’re fascinated by them.
    I had contemplated writing a vampire book set in the time of the Napoleonic Wars — well, I’m still thinking about it in the back of my mind — and had started some research about them. There’s a little book on my shelf at home titled “Fact or Fiction? The History And Mystery Of Vampires”. It’s okay but a little lightweight. I much prefer your poem, which says much more about the subject than the 47-page book does.

  13. It works as a vampire story for me and you should write more poetry. This was very moody and evocative and I liked it a lot, Björn.

  14. Your words danced off the screen and played with my emotions. I love “sweet maiden say your evening prayer”.

  15. A brilliant – really impressive – rhyming scheme that creates an eerie incantation- esque rhythm that works fantastically with that chilling content.

  16. Delicious descriptions – marble nape – and love the meter which gives a light feel to nefarious activities. Love it.

  17. I’ll let you in on a little secret: Every time I read this, I actually think of wonton soup … the “moon” (one of those dumplings) floating in your soup bowl while you prepare to eat “her” at a Chinese restaurant. Read it like that; it all becomes suddenly very funny — like this whole intense, emotional experience is just about you getting your dinner. Hilarious. 🙂 Then she just keeps bobbing around in your bowl while you try to stab her with your fork, but you just can’t quite get there.

  18. I’ve always had a sneaking suspicion that vampires have the hottest sex. I just feel like their attitudes towards menstruation might be a little put-offish.

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