Your scent is moon, a song
of lilies left at night;
you’re whispered pages
torn from notebooks,
memories;
you’re my rage, insomnia,
the emery of finger-
prints as left on skin;
you’re rash
of present and a past in sin;
but in my future: ash.
Night Creatures by Lee Krasner
Today it’s Quadrille at dVerse. Which means that the challenge is to write a poem in exactly 44 words that has to include the word whisper. Join us at 3PM EST.
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January 16, 2016
Björn Rudbergs writings 
Perfection
This is my favorite:
“you’re my rage, insomnia,
the emery of finger-
prints as left on skin”
I like that “ash” could take this in so many directions … phoenix, everything being burned up, cremation, pyre, burning house, burning bed, burning pages in a fireplace.
I think I see lovers torn apart by death, but you leave so much up to the imagination playground. Anything could be happening.
Oh, now I see what you’ve done. In my future, a shhh. Very clever.
And now that I’ve had a certain conversation with someone, I see this as being from a father talking to his perhaps adult child.
if those notebooks could talk…
Those are the relationships that teach the most; if we can stand the pain. I never could.
I like this very much. Top notch.
a song of lilies left at night… wow!
https://thotpurge.wordpress.com/2017/01/16/memories-age-badly/
A beautiful write Björn, ‘you’re whispered pages
torn from notebooks’ leaves so much more waiting to be written.
To me I see this poem of yours as an experiment of pure creative writing and a challenge of the mind. Brilliant work of creativeness my friend. 🙂
The visuals pop out at me like a museum of notebooks and memories. 🙂
Love that scent, lilies, emery and rage ~ Clever ending too with ash…shshsh….
Whew. Powerful, burning words here. That whisper got loud, as some are want to do. Wonderful.
I love the scent of lilies at night. From a whisper to a shout….gorgeous use of the word whisper.
Beautiful and confusing, the emotions of a complex relationship.
Brilliant, Bjorn. Each read gave me new insight and I had to go back after seeing the comments Iris left. That’s what so exciting about poetry–the layers that reveal so many facets.
a sticky one…a tricky poem
so much beauty here Bjorn. Very moving.
I love this, Björn – and not a librarian in sight! You’ve really gone for the senses – moon scent and song of lilies, emery of fingerprints and that final ‘ash’.
Whispered pages torn from notebooks …… great line Bjorn!
Insomnia is a kind of rage since one tosses and turns with all that whispered chatter in the mind.
Yowza! ❤️ Such an inspiring write 😀
Love the ending. All emotions involved her. Almost consuming.
Still fantastic. I’ll never tire of reading this poem. I need to save the link.
This time, the artwork and the hanging “prints” made me think of animals prints, either on actual animals or on clothing, bedding, or accessories. This is what I love about poetry that has at least some abstract element. You can read and read and read and keep finding more details and more stories embedded.
Excellent work, brother.
Goodness, you could really even be talking to yourself in a mirror. Endless possibility for interpretation.
“you’re rash/of present and a past in sin;” – great line. 🙂
“the emery of finger-
prints as left on skin;”
geez. and that last line. ❤
scent of the moon and whisper of torn pages, such lovely writing, Björn 🙂
Romance and insomnia…which came first? Either may be a whisper…or a rage. Stunning way to end!
I wonder about the words whispered on those pages…in the quiet hours of restlessness, I often find a pen
Excellent piece, Bjorn. You’ve weave this piece with those beautiful descriptions.
This feels so romantic and wistful.
oh those secret, sinful pleasures…so pleasant at the time…but we’ll pay for them eventually!
ooooh…I was sailing along until that last word….
I’ve missed your expressive ways, my friend. Wonderful indeed!
Intriguing, so many possibilities for interpretation. I also find you are getting more and more concise, stripping to the minimum of layers and words.
I think these memories are worthy of insomnia. A very moving write, Bjorn.
A joy to read, Bjorn. ❤
Beautiful series of images.
The first two lines are really beautiful.
Excellent description of insomnia. These lines describe my own insomnia, when I have it (which thankfully isn’t often):
you’re whispered pages
torn from notebooks,
memories
Beautifully romantic – but oh, sad (if true) about the ash.
‘you’re whispered pages/torn from notebooks,/memories’ – Just one example of the beautiful imagery in this poem.