In a ramschackle pub by the dock

The foghorn wailed, when at the bar
through scurvy teeth a sailor hissed
and slammed his fist. “Tonight I’m pissed”
the room went silent, barmaid jarred
remembered nights before the war
before her lover went to sea
before the news that killed her pleas
and now she saw in pockmarked face
the sailor’s eyes as dead as glass.
She watched him begging on his knees.

The biter drunk by Adriaen Brouwer

The biter drunk by Adriaen Brouwer

Tonight Gayle is teaching us the décima at dVerse MTB. The form we are doing is the version from Puerto Rico with 10 lines each having 8 syllables (My choice was to do tetrameter) with a rhymescheme A B B A A C C D D C. Come and join us when the bar opens at 3 PM EST.

April 20, 2016

25 responses to “In a ramschackle pub by the dock

  1. Pingback: My Road | Another Fearless Year·

  2. Ah, I hope he soon goes back to sea again! (without alcohol on board!) It sounds like he could wreak a lot of havoc in the bar if he was on land too long.

  3. Terrific historical illustration with a pitch perfect Decima pitched in the strike zone. Wow, more than a poem a day this month’; that would be too exhausting for this old man.

  4. Excellent and perfectly executed, Bjorn, what a great story and loved the detail “foghorn wailed”, “scurvy teeth”, “pockmarked face.” I could detect nothing that hinted that this did not flow effortlessly from your pen (or brain.) Smiles…

  5. The title on its own is so evocative, It reminds me of a small pub in Great Yarmouth where an old friend of ours played with his band to an audience of drunk sailors fresh off a Russian ship! We got out before the fight started!

  6. Very cool. Your word palette paints the tale. I am there. And, the rhyme of the piece!!! Somehow that manages to ratchet up the shock and awe, even further.

  7. You paint a haunting, eclectic scene. The rhyme flow was unforced and easy… well written.

    Also, using the title as setting the tone, or in essence, an extra line, is a brilliant tactic. i wish I had thought of it 1st!

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