Stay the night or …

“You want to stay the night, or … ?”

I recalled the motel-manager’s question. What else than staying?

There was a mirror above the king size bed, and there were cobwebs in the bathroom. The stains on the carpet, were probably not the result of sloppy breakfast manners.

You were silent, but your eyes held curses. Outside an SUV left. Who would leave a room a rainy night at 1 AM?

The black matchbox had only a local phone-number, nothing else.

A car arrived; another one left.

We didn’t sleep a lot that night, and left at break of dawn.

This is partly based on a true experience of checking into the wrong type of Motel.

Friday Fictioneers is a blogging community run by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, one picture, 100 words. What do you see in the picture?

October 14, 2015

72 responses to “Stay the night or …

  1. My favorite part is the subtlety in the bathroom cobwebs. And the silent curses in your wife’s eyes; I know that look quite well and am an expert at giving it.

  2. Hey, Bjorn, I have stayed there.
    More than once, in more than one country.
    Excellent portrayal of the bottom end of the market.

  3. Not sure what this says about me, but afraid this is very funny – the hapless tourist. Many of us have been there in some form or other, few will admit to it.

  4. Dear Björn,

    Like CEAyr, I’ve stayed in that hotel in more than one place. Those are the kind of experiences that make great anecdotes later on. Well done.



  5. Pingback: While the World Dissolves Around Us | MJL Stories·

  6. it looks one of those motels where folks don’t stay the night. they just rent a room for a hour or so. they are usually located in a seedy neighborhood.

  7. I was going to go the same route as your story when i saw the picture because it reminded me of a motel i was put up when I first came to the US and it was exactly was you described. Didn’t sleep a wink.

    Nice piece of writing.

  8. (The black matchbox had only local a local phone-number- Too many “locals” in this sentence?)
    A bleak story. I think I stayed in this room once and recently, too!

  9. *Shudder*! It appears more than one of us has stayed in this type of “establishment” – not a wink did I have either! Well done.

  10. Nicely described. I don’t think I’d sleep much either. And I’d probably wedge a chair under the door handle (though the place is probably a fire trap as well!).

  11. This was great, you gave me the “shivi jivvies” without telling a gruesom thing, just by the description and the coming and going of cars late at night. What would you call that a thriller? Anyways, nicely done.

  12. Not a nice place to stay but when travelling one does not always know. I have friends whose parents owned that motel;) no really, the stories one told us as teens!! Part of my education on life 🙂

  13. Oh, this sounds like a dicey place, Bjorn. The stains aren’t because of sloppy breakfast manners. I don’t want to know. This is my favorite line, “You were silent, but your eyes held curses.” So well written!

  14. That wold be the kind of motel where you’d stay in an emergency-only basis. I loved the way you listed the clues to what it was. Well done, Bjorn. 😀 — Suzanne

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