with Midas touch that leads me on
your promises of more to come
myopic stings of lathered buns
psychotic misses take me home
mischievously like Sisyphus
fills up his rock-pretend-balloons
oblivious of plastic organ-pipes
I greet my cheerleader’s baboons
and compose my lonesome eulogy
before I’m jumping in analogies

I kept this under 53 words, and I also tried with some figurative language. Hope it fits for Toads tonight
May 24, 2014
Bjorn, I really liked this alot. Would like to see you expand on this. >KB
I had to keep it below 53 words for the challenge.. But there might be something to build on.
Definitely. >KB
Gosh, I love those rock-pretend-balloons.
A cheating Sisophos
oha – the plastic organ-pipes made me cringe a bit…wondering how they would sound… it’s a cool practice as well to keep poems short… that’s why i loved the 55’s a lot – it forces you to think careful about every word
Indeed.. I write quite a lot of haiku.. and also some twitter poetry.. so yes it’s a good thing –
I love the idea of jumping in analogies. I would say that would be quite a leap. Smiles.
Indeed… but better than jumping to conclusions
I love it. You are the coolest. 🙂
Many thanks
Hm. I don’t think there was a bee in the shower … it must have been a stinging analogy for organ pipes.
I like the heavy balloons and the plastic organ pipes. Sounds like making do with what you have. Beware of the analogies.
A nice busy write, non stop so take a big breath before reading aloud. 🙂
..
So… the promises might be just deceitful lies but he’s hoping for the best (I hope she’s worth it) 😛
Sisyphus’s workload lessened… 🙂
I have to admit I didn’t understand some of it but it flowed well. —Susan
I like the nod to the mythical take specially: myopic stings of lathered buns ~ Enjoy your weekend Bjorn ~
Yes, these myopic stings of lathered buns are especially intriguing! A lot of fun here, Bjorn. K.
Clever allusions to Greek Mythology. Nice.
What a concoction and/or cacophony in your home. My grandparents had an organ in the diningroom. Enormous it was, and my mother was the organist from the age of 13. They used it before meals as part of their religious way of life. I’m sure yours is not real 🙂
A vivid scene of sight and sound Bjorn
Ha! Delightful word choices, Bjorn. I especially like the cheerleader’s baboons.It doesn’t pay to get too serious with either eulogy or analogy sometimes.