A modern dynasty – Friday Fictioneers

· by · in flashfiction, Friday Fictioneers. ·


To twinkling candle-light and sound of waves.
A breeze that gently touched their naked skin.

They had been young, they had been free.
When love was all that mattered, and dowry wasn’t set.

But now the candle-wax had set,
like all the scars of acid, that marred her face.

He took her hand, and watched the candle light
reflected in her eyes.

They had survived, and proved, that love can be much stronger
then all the prejudice of family traditions.

He took her wrinkled hand in his and said:

“In you, I found the love that built a modern dynasty”

Copyright Renee Heath

Copyright Renee Heath


The poet in me wanted to tell a bitter-sweet romantic story this week. No murders, but hopefully with an edge, but with a happy end.

Friday fictioneers is a blogging community tirelessly led by Rochelle Wissoff-Fields. Joining the community spirit it’s important to comment on as many you manage. If you feel you like it, tell me so, if there is something you don’t like – please feel free to comment.

And today it’s two years since I started blogging. Hurrah for that 🙂


—
April 30, 2014

113 responses to “A modern dynasty – Friday Fictioneers”

  1. Dear Björn,

    Hm. It seems your “like” button has disappeared. WP weird glitch I suppose. 😉

    Obviously this is a man whose love is deeper than skin. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

  6. Ha! I’m the opposite – I used to keep the ‘Like’ and not allow comments when too busy to answer. Love conquers all in this classical tragedy. Culturally interesting and all too real unbelievably.

  7. Bjorn,
    I just saw a picture of a woman and her daughter whose husband had attacked them with acid. What a horrible way to punish someone, especially a loved one. I’m glad it does end happily and that their love can triumph, through the hardest ordeals.
    -David

  9. Congrats on 2 years of blogging.
    “In you, I found the love that built a modern dynasty” – Great finishing line, so many poems of love, sometimes it’s hard to find new or non-cliche ways to state it, but this is really memorable and full of lovely connotations.
    Thanks!
    ~Z

  11. I love what you have done with what must be a dreadfully harrowing experience, by letting the love shine through.
    Well done
    Dee

  14. Bjorn, I “liked” the story even without the button. 🙂 Good story. Here they’re trying to stop the sale of industrial acid to keep these terrible disfigurements from happening. It’s sickening that brutal people are doing these things.Well done.

    Susan

  16. Wow.. I’m very surprised (and glad) to see the happy ending, if you don’t mind me saying this. I really enjoy your dark pieces, but this one was beautiful.. Yes, we need people like him in the modern age.. nicely done! 🙂

  17. Bjorn – the idea of throwing acid in a woman’s face to mar her for life, to make her undesirable for anyone has always turned my stomach and made me want to scream. The love you combined with that horrid practice shines a new light on it. Thank you for the lovely poem.

  19. You read so much about this acid-throwing business these days, it makes you despair of human nature. But your story this week showed a brighter, altogether happier side. Well done Bjorn.

  20. Congratulations on both the story and the two years, both wonderfully done. I’m sure there are really men like this who transcend what their culture is telling them and listen to their hearts and consciences, at least I pray there are. We need them to stand up and be heard.

    janet

  21. A wonderful story of love that has weathered over the years but never broken. It was very suspenseful, because I was expecting a less-than-happy ending (which, you’re right, seems to be rather common among Friday Fictioneers). You left this possibility with each line, that the story could fall either way, like a tipping point. Very engaging!

  23. ugh it turns my stomach that this actually happens to women…the acid…but i love a good love story and one that endures over time….really a lovely tale you gave them bjorn…

  24. I’m not really a poem type of person, but I have to say, I found this very powerful and connecting. In this consumer driven age, with the “I want it now” brigade, what you describe is unfortunately less common. From a personal point of view, this is something we should all seek!

  29. Hi Bjorn
    I like the ‘like’ button – it allows me to appreciate something when I don’t have anything particular to say – it’s like a smile to a friend.
    Cool poem (see – now I’ve had to add an inane comment!)

  30. Very powerful in so few words – you’ve told the whole story of their lives and how their love has survived through such adversity.

  31. This was cool! I especailly liked the picture of the melting wax.

  35. Congratulations on your two years – I passed my one year earlier in April 🙂
    I love a survival story. The throwing of acid is barbaric, and then denied by those that can (and do) get away with it.

  36. Really enjoyed this one, Björn. Deep and meaningful, this story digs in. I want to understand it better; can you explain the acid? Did he accept her despite the scars and without dowry, or had his family scarred her, and they persevered?
    Happy anniversary!

  38. With all the news items about African girls being kidnapped to be sold as brides, and Syrian refugee girls being traded by their families, this lovely poem should reach a wider audience.

  41. Reminded me of the old woman in the film TITANIC with Kate Winslett and Leonardo de Caprio, insofar as the abiding love she shared with the man who gave her the sapphire pendant which she threw back into the deep, blue ocean. Who knows what great romances go through to survive the tests of time. Beautifully written, as always…

  42. Amazing, Bjorn. The tone changed quickly here with the wax setting and then scarring on the face! Seamless and fluid. Well done!

    • My assumption is that the inlaws threw acid in her face after being unhappy with the dowry.. but her husband decided to break with her parents, and together they become a new modern dynasty – breaking the old traditions.

  45. I love this. I’ve heard how men have thrown acid in their wives face out of hate. It’s nice to read story of one whose love is deeper than a scared face. Beautiful.
    Phyllis

  46. A tragic love story, beautifully written. It is one of my most favorite genres. Thank you for doing my photo justice my good sir.

    Love, Renee

  48. sad and wonderful at the same time, Bjorn. it’s hard to go against one’s own family and also stand by someone disfigured by a tragic situation. great story.

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