70 responses to “On shores of Susquehanna”

1. Your ability to convey a story in your poetry always amazes me. I live by the Susquehanna River in Pennsylvania. Stories of murder/suicide are rampant in our national news. Not so much with suicide pacts. Sad either way.

   • Oh yes.. I have never been there.. but to me this was something out of a sad old novel… actually a little bit of Elvira Madigan.. if you ever have heard about that…

2. Intense. It was really soothing and then came the abrupt ending. Reminded me a bit of Annabel Lee.
   Very well-penned. Loved it.

   • Oh yes.. these classical stories in the form of poetry are quite an inspiration…

     • Have you read Lord Ullin’s daughter by Thomas Campbell? Amazing ballad.
       I am recalling all these poems now. Gotta read them all again. 🙂

     • Not really.. Need to check it out.

     • Just read it.. A wonderful ballad.. Really powerful

3. a terrific rocking of the prompt, brother; both Elvira
   Madigan (also a fine movie) & FRANKIE & JOHNNY something Victorian, like Keats; really liked what you did with it, sir, in ballad form.

   • Elvira Madigan is also a broadside poem in Swedish… wonderfully done…

4. Very tragic ending to this, what seemed to have been, a love story. Nicely penned, Bjorn.

   • Thank you Mary.. what starts with a tweet can be something longer..

5. What a tragic ending Bjorn ~ Enjoyed your 55 words ~ Happy Friday ~

   • Ha. happy Thursday 🙂

6. I enjoyed the ballad tone and the twist at the end transforms it into a tragic story!

   • Thank you … yes it’s a great form to write.

7. oh snap…what a story eh? you even had words to spare…enough to work out the repetition…ha…tragic bit of a story bjorn…

   • Ah,, wanted it to be possible to sing.. though I lack the voice and melody to do so..

8. Wow, you packed such music into your 55 words. Well done!

   • Thank you.. I think if I had a guitar and a melody I would be singing now..

     • You already were.

9. Having many times visited the banks of the Susquehanna, I envisioned this happening in the late 18th or early 19th Century. Matters not a lot except to me. The piece stands upon its own brilliant spirit and talent.

   • Ah,.. exactly my thoughts when I wrote the piece… Thank you Joe..

10. oh heck… you know… from the peaceful start i didn’t expect the bullet…heck…what a twist… well done…

    • Ah.. yes.. in my prose I love to include twists.. really one favourite of mine..

11. What a sad story! Passing a river is a strong symbol of a new beginning, and the end should be different for the two of them!! Well. The symbols you use is nice. The thought of the moon, the faith, indulging to be hidden behind the sky is great.

    • I’m sure you are familiar with Elvira Madigan.. I envision the story of impossible love..

12. a beautifully penned tragedy!

    • Thank you Laurie ..

13. Amazing, you fit so much story into such a small space and with scenery that breathes in every word.

    • Thank you Nara.. Loved to write it..

14. The Chemung and Upper Susquehannah, and their banks are familiar to me too. Billie Collins wrote a poem about them too I believe.Maybe not such a traagic one.

    • Thank you aprille.. I have not been there… captured the story out of my imagination and things I have read… maybe a little Nick Cave too.

15. I of my favorites of yours… just like a oil painting its something to cherish

    • Thank you… wanted to mimic an old sad ballad.

16. Scary ending, you poetically got it all together in 55. Picture really pulls with your write. LIKE LIKE LIKE.

    • Thank you… Loved to write it..

17. Very intense ending. A very big canvas for 55 words – I must say.

    • Thank you .. I loved writing it.

18. What the embrace…I stopped to feel it…and then was shot by the bullet you’ve prepared for them…:( ~ great ballad, and …ready to be performed with music, nice.

    • Thank you 🙂

19. Yeah, I was digging it just fine until the bullet took them both and I then I dug it all the more!

    • I dig that you dig 🙂

20. A suicide pact is the most saddest. It gives not a chance for either when both are forced into a common decision. Nicely read Bjorn!

    Hank

    • Those are the intensest part of sadness.

21. Oh my, that was not an ending that I was expecting! i like to be surprised and you really did it well. Actually there was a really nice rhythm to this that set up the surprise to REALLY surprise. I say that because when I get into the rhythm of a poem I have expectations, don’t know why. This was very cool.

    • Oh thank you… yes I think this could easily be a longer piece… but it was limited to 55 words.. I thought of one of these ballads describing sad events .. darkness and passion.

22. Hm…not familiar with Elvira Madigan…still…a stunning collection of 55 words!

    • I think Elvira Madigan is most famous through a Swedish film that had some international success.

23. Your very lovely “accent” certainly gives this piece for me with “American ears” a very lovely lilt indeed. Classic tragic “love story” told made all the more beautiful with the use of Susquehannah.

    • Thank you.. this was fun to write, and reading is something I try to do if I have time..

24. Oh! wow such a lovely poem in a few words and it said all:)

    • Thank you 🙂

25. This is so well-done. With that beginning invocaton, you echo a ballad from olden times, and then that ending, like something out of Edward Arlington Robinson. Brilliant.

    • Thank you so much. this was so fun.. honestly I’m humbled.

26. i’ve been to the Susquehanna! It is a beautiful river, and name–(Native American) — and great subject for a poem and works especially well with this one. k.

    • Thank you.. I have never visiting really.. I have probably crossed it many years ago.. but the name is so beautiful.. And my fantasy took me the rest of the way..

27. A ballad in just 55 words – you certainly don’t make life easy for yourself, Bjoern, but it works!

28. The word Susquehanna is in itself beautifully poetic. You’ve given it its due.

29. You’ve created a wonderful story in this short poem. Beautiful and tragic.

30. Susquehanna…
    Even the mere mention of the name sounds soothing.
    Too bad the murderer didn’t think so
    Loved your Form 55 My Friend
    Thanks for playing and sharing, thanks for visiting, and have a Kick Ass Week-End

31. the repetition in the opening lines of each stanza is very powerful. Sad, but beautiful poem

32. absolutely reminds me of old ballads – atmospheric and beautiful! K

33. This reminds me of “The Highwayman” by Alfred Noyes–mush abbreviated. Good.

34. You sure put a lot into your 55 words and it really sounds like something that wasn’t new but a traditionally “folksy”…I’ve heard the name so often but never have been there…enjoyed hearing your voice.!

35. I remember Elvira Madigan. Made a great impression. Never give up your day job and flout society rules unless you want to starve to death. And in those times you did.

    Reminded me More of the ballad ….Banks of the Ohio

36. ouch! very well done

37. Beautiful and tragic piece.

38. I saw this and was reading and thought “Oh he should have recorded this” and then I looked down further and smiled. A tragic but lovely piece BR.

39. Oh – what a sad and sorry tale. Reminds me of Romeo and Juliet, although of course he didn’t take their lives…

40. sad…your voice echoes it. beautiful!

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