when colours gone to shades of grey
my brimstone heart is devil’s pawn
I should have walked the narrow way
when colours gone
when noose is tight, it pulls me down
the sinner’s highest price is paid
I dance on ash with charcoal swans
I suffocate, it’s late to pray
and on my head a burning crown
why ever could I life betray?
when colours gone
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December 3, 2013
Björn Rudbergs writings 
I dance on ash with charcoal swans….oh heck…. what an image… it would be the most terrible thing for me when the colors were gone.. but sin is def. sth. that does suck the color out of our world..
Well, this certainly gives me pause for introspection, mainly about this:
why ever could I life betray?
Thank you for this deep poem.
Love this. I really enjoy your writing. You have such a way of making words sing. The first verse is my favorite.
this is lovely to read having its own music… so much thought between those grey lines
so true…it is hard when we are down and no longer see the colours…we become easy prey for the snares, the temptations that will surely wreck our lives…nicely done in form too sir….
You have tenderly and poetically written of one of life’s greatest challenges!
Excellent work with the form! “my brimstone heart” and “I dance on ash with charcoal swans”…intense and incredible imagery. Superb roundel.
Like others I’m haunted by the dancing with charcoal swans; a very strong poem, brother, with deep insights, & significant message; one of your best, and def a winner; thanks.
Oh, I hear the regret in this poem, Bjorn. Sometimes it is just too late to change things.
Wow the imagery here is just amazing . . . and the lack of colors hits hard.
Such strong imagery, so dark, so woeful – ‘when colours gone’ is so dolorous….
When gone can be hard to get back, but doesn’t stop one from trying at ones shack
Very nice use of the form, I appreciate that. Imagery is sound, and your tone is wonderful.
All hope seems to have deserted the world ‘when colours gone’. Sadness pervades your lines tonight.
I love this form–it just singing itself–beautifully done
I have a sister in law who says gray makes her depressed. Yet, my favorite rooms are light to medium gray walls with white and taupe accents. (of course, colorful artwork and accents) and a touch of black somewhere. Ha. You can tell I want to redecorate ;P Anyway,
Melancholy is wonderfully expressed here – how the will can almost get lost… Thank God, it is never too late to pray…
So eerie…bring back the colors! Though sometimes, we need those shades of gray to realize just how beautiful colors can be.
This is very haunting and – oh I don’t know what other word to use – but I love the final stanza in particular. I only hope it is not too late to pray. Peace, Linda
What a tribute to procrastination…or not appreciating the colors! For me such happens, when fresh snow limits my choices where to go…~ amazing black&white images though… 🙂
Wow! Brilliant write. What tangled web you have woven. Short, concise, and quotable. Excellent piece, Bjorn. Loving your work.
I was struck by the same line as Claudia “I dance on ash with charcoal swans” Indeed, “Wide is the road that leads to destruction” (OK, you didn’t say that, but I think that you inferred it with your “narrow way” part). Some great imagery in this poem!
Deep thoughts in simple ways. Great and sad. Causes you to think. Scale of gray and all colors gone, that really works. 🙂
This has such a classic feel to it. Bravo.
The feel in the mouth while reading it aloud is good…I’ll get to the other stuff later, but a poem that feels good in the mouth is there 70% for me.
Excellent! old and exacting.
Wow, one of the strongest and powerful writing I have ever read in your blog.
A strong and deep poem!
with so much ignorance (grey) in the world today it’s hard to see the the colors of those who are vibrant… this was a brilliant write, I very much enjoyed it.
And so the question for that person is; What now? And the answer is what Jesus said, “I will have mercy, and not sacrifice”. Praised be The Lord!
Bjorn, this is a beautiful poem; the form, the musicality, the images – I too am struck by the brimstone heart and charcoal swans – all combine into a wonderful whole.
Look out for roundels at Form for All at some point in the new year … smiles
“I dance on ash with charcoal swans.” That line by itself is worth the price of admission.
The colours are certainly not gone from your lyrically beautiful verse 🙂 Very Nice!
So very dark and dramatic. I love this!
A down feeling can be most testing. The colors do fade when things get astray. Nice roundel Bjorn!
Hank
oh my this
and outside my window, ll is black and white and gray
and will remain so until May
colour is gone indeed
I enjoy this form and you’ve rendered it well. This has a Bosch-like feel to it and how true that colorless days can incite grim thoughts.
Yes, when we’re down and despairing everything seems colorless and grey. Very well written.
Bjorn, tis a sad day when the colors are gone and all
we see and feel is grey.
By the way, Bjorn, I’m still in Reno which is considered high desert at an altitude of 4500+ We are in the Sierra Nevada not from from Lake Tahoe. In January we’re off to the So. California low desert. You get old, you get cold! :0) (Although my husband who is Norwegian, loves the cold.)
Wow, Bjorn – a very deep, introspective piece. Almost self-flagellating. Powerful images – the noose of regret..so true! But, I think that colour comes back eventually when you accept that you’re only human. This has moved me a lot. Sending hugs, hoping it’s not true for you.. Mwah!
Your poetry gets better all the time..love the study and the form!
one of your best – the last stanza especially!
You write best in form. Your damnation described as wearing a burning crown of thorns dancing with charcoal swans on hot ash is a brilliant surreal image. Of course you do know hell is much worse than that. L’enfer c’est les autres 🙂 as Sartre said
Bjorn, that line “dance on ash with charcoal swans” fabulous! And wonderful form, I enjoy form when other poets write it, especially as well as you 🙂
A strong poem BR – how sad to reach a point of our life ~ ourselves without colour and agree with all the comments about dance on ash with charcoal swans – amazing.
Beautiful and dark write. Love the charcoal swans. Perfect.
Well..I can’t help but say that reminds me of the living human hell..that well.is really real in real life2…
AS the gray that can be the death of the living green…
But always hope for renewal once again away from charcoal swans..into phoenix instead..full of light….
And colours too…
some vivid and striking imagery Bjorn. really pushing this one into the visible side of the spectrum, almost bursting. best 🙂
Bjorn, I am glad you put the image after the poem. Almost shocking how well the roundel fit the image, and I can understand how your came to write this. Dark, moody, classical feeling, fine write. Amy
Very easy to relate to as I reflect on choices hastily made. If my past I felt punishable…but as of today I know all you can do is accept, learn and move forward.
Beautiful vivid imagery dear.
dancing on ash with charcoal swans… such a fabulous image, and i love all the layers in this, peeling each away, finding more and more meaning.
truly thoughtful….enjoyed reading
Just an atmospheric piece, really felt the emotions in this one -and great imagery too; I especially love this line:
“I dance on ash with charcoal swans”
Very vivid. A delight to read a classy piece. ✨
Lovely refrain and form Bjorn ~ I should dip my hand into this form again ~
I think Tony’s got something planned…
whoa! what an impact with such rounded imagery, very powerful bjorn –
“it’s late to pray
and on my head a burning crown”
what powerful words indeed! much to remember and consider….
Let’s not have this loss, let’s not. Your images burn and accuse, as if evil itself could not stand the lack of colour.
Very intense, I really like this piece a lot.
“I dance on ash with charcoal swans / I suffocate, it’s late to pray” Very good; something about this poem reminds me of Macbeth.
Lot of people keep doing sin till something like this happen……. Woo Ur page is so gr8 and ur pic on top is so nice and good…….. Thanks for dropping by……
Inspirational imagery.
Gustave Dore sure knew how to ink a frame from hell … this is a great entry into that sedimental sentiment, where the poem of hell is to “dance on ash with charcoal swans.”
Cool poem. Interesting.