62 responses to “Summer tanka for dVerse”

1. smiles….i dont mind the november fireplace…its funny though how when in one season we have those moments wishing for others…and it happens every season…ha…i love squirrels so the second one is def my fav…smiles.

   • I love squirrels too. especially the cute one we have in the garden.

2. Like the tanka set, specially the second one about the squirrel ~ The nature touches are lovely – summer rain, old willow tree waking up ~

   One guideline I follow in tanka is that the middle line (like a bridge) can be cut and read in two ways: the first three lines as one post, then the last three lines as another post ~ Seen from this perspective, you can check if your 5 line post gives you both perspective ~

   Happy Tuesday Bjorn ~

3. nice…i like them all but my fav is the third…love lullabies…i sometimes sing them for myself…but all the better when the summer rain sings them…and some fall asleep…some wake…i like

4. …def you wrote a set of contemporary tankas here… classic tankas must follow the standard count per line of 5-7-5-7-7… tanka is actually 2 independent poems (5-7-5 & 5-7-7) that are combined together to read as one having the 3rd line be the bridge & must be versatile as it contributes a role in both independent poems.

   ..that said, i think of the 3 your 2nd one will most likely be considered as a tanka while the other two are just plainly verse as i don’t think you picked the right bridge to connect two independent poems… your 1st & 3rd for me reads only as one… peace… it was almost 2 yrs ago when i last wrote a tanka… before i shifted to free verse haikus, tankas, tanagas & sonnets were my genres in poetry… & i have written pretty a lot of each of ’em before i lost my inspiration in writing & deleted my old blog… smiles… maybe, sometime i’ll try to revive some of my works from the long long lost past… hihi…. thanks for reminding me of one of my first loves in writing… smiles…

   • Thank you Kelvin.. yes I missed on the bridge one.. as Grace also pointed out. I might work a little bit on that one. On syllables, I follow the modern haiku lines a little were the 575 is totally abandoned.

5. I plan to soak up as much sun as I can, to store up as many memories as I can, for November, which will come all too soon. I like the idea of summer rain singing lullabies as well.

6. Bjorn, I would gladly give you feed back on your ‘Tanka’ but when it comes to forms I am either unschooled or uninterested. It is a failing. I keep my own senses of form depending on what the function of the poem calls for. But as a poem, and a small knowledge of haiku and such, I found your poem to be insightful and alluring in its touch.>KB

   • Thank you.. haiku I’m starting to get a grip on.. but I’m still to learn tanka…

7. Really like the second one. Like the reminding about the forgotten.

   good stuff.

   • Thank you 🙂

8. Wonderful display. Bjorn. It will be November before we know it.

   • Yes it will.. and some part of me will enjoy the fireplace

9. wonderful, wonderful warm season tankas 🙂 my favorite’s the second (i just adore squirrels)

   • Thank you Yelena

10. You prove once again that no season stands alone–in each we find memories of another.

    • Yes .. it’s all connected I think

11. I love the way you captured the feel of the season in these. Lovely.

    • Thank you Kelly.

12. What a pleasure. I love how it all circles back to itself. Beautiful work.

    • Thank you Beth 🙂

13. Oh, I am so with you — I am soaking up this heat for when I am shivering by the fireplace in November! Love the form too, Bjorn — am creeping up on a tanka. Thanks for illustrating.

14. I loved these–especially the first one–beautiful feeling in this–

    • Thank you 🙂

15. a falling leaf
    reminds the squirrel
    what he forgot
    acorns underneath
    saplings seek the sun

    a poem in itself, at least to these eyes. beautiful and tender words.

    • Thank you 🙂

16. Really enjoyed the one about the squirrel – I know how he feels sometimes.

    • Thank you 🙂

17. The first stanza is perfect! Would love to have it on a photo. So good.

    • Thank you 🙂

18. You’ve painted a beautiful picture with words. Thanks for visiting me and for your comment AND for the tweet!

    • 🙂

19. Enjoyed this so much, Bjorn. I think I must have a Japanese poet somewhere way back in my ancestry or a past life–I love this form and those related. Hard to choose a favorite here but I guess I’ll go with the 3rd one. Lovely

    • Trying to understand all the possibilities in those three lines (or 5) I think is a lot more difficult than I thought first.. and when you stop counting syllables but try to think in juxtaposition and so on.. I love it.

20. it’s the third for me. love water. and willow takes me back to childhood.

    • Thank you 🙂 water can be nice in summer…

21. Since “la-de-dah-de-dah-de-dah” I know nothing about poetic form. Is it OK if I still THOROUGHLY enjoy reading your Tankas? To me these are like quaint vignettes. I remember in symphony one time playing concert with a narrator reciting tankas along with the music. It was “simply” AWESOME (Simply used on purpose!)

    Thank you!
    PEACE and LIGHT!

22. A beautiful write..I like the part about the summer rain singing lullabies and I have a passion for willow trees.

23. old willow tree waking from his sleep…. thank you … and thank you for hosting tonight… let us all be ravished by poetry

24. The second stanza is my favorite – oops!

25. Lovely tanka…loved the forgetful squirrel. 🙂

26. The first is my favorite. Memories of the warm glow…nice tanka!

27. Not an expert on tanka, but love the nature imagery and how each stanza captures one season as it evokes another

28. I really liked these, especially the second one.

    • Thank you.. and I had to enter a limerick this week.. It’s been a while since last time I wrote one.

29. These are sweet nuggets, Bjorn. Poor squirrel … Do they really remember where they store their nuts? 🙂

    • I think it’s very common that they forgot their hiding place. I see them collecting hazel nuts every autumn..

30. Beautiful, Bjorn! I get a real sense of being there and remembering all with you at your November fireplace.:)

    • Thank you.

31. great nature poem… loved the line regarding the squirrel and leaf

32. Grand images of summer when the world is awake and thriving.

33. I love tanka, Bjorn. These are exquisite.

    Pamela

34. And what did the old willow have to say, Bjorn? Inquiring minds would like to know. 🙂

    • Yes indeed, but he only speak sussurus 😉

      • Oh! I hate it when that happens!

35. really lovely motion and subtle evocation.

36. All the tankas are great. I like the third one best. Anything with cool running water is a big hit around here. Tankas for the verses

    • Thank your 🙂

37. acorns underneath
    saplings seek the sun

    Events overtake us if we’re not careful.
    Tanka is a further development to the laziness of haiku! Like it bette
    r with all the 3 at once Bjorn!

    Hank

38. I love these lines especially these… sound of water
    as the summer rain
    sing lullabies
    but old willow tree
    waking from his sleep.

39. Who wouldn’t love your writing? Tanka is a breeze compared to the other forms you do. I see a lot of your favorite words in these? Don’t grow tired of beautiful words. Nice job on OLN! May many more honors be bestowed on you.

    • I just enjoy writing … a true joy..

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.