Once again time to write a Friday Fictioneer’s story. I always aim for 100 words exactly. Take out the napkins, today it’s a sad story.
Friday Fictioneers is a wonderful group of bloggers from around the world who every week gather to write a story of 100 words (more or less). If you want to know more, go to Rochelle Wissoff-Fields page and check it out. If you only want to check out the great stories click the little blue guy at the bottom.
Copyright Sarah Ann Hall
As spring arrives he’s once again drawn back to the old aqueduct. He can still see the beautiful new-mown lawns and recall the unusually warm spring day when he still lived with expectations.
How he and Emily enjoyed the chilled Champagne, and how they cheered for a bright future.
That was before the shriek. The ambulances, the investigations that followed and Emily’s escape into a world of medication is now blurred into many years of nightmarish memories.
But the small body floating in the canal he still recalls with photographic precision.
Swinging his scythe he starts cutting the high grass.
—
May 15, 2013
Björn Rudbergs writings 
The picture conveys a wonderful sense of mystery – does it not?
We obviously both saw bodies somehow hidden
well done Bjorn – I wouldnt want to cut that grass back
I’m afraid there will be lot’s of bodies this week.
Dear Björn,
You took me from idyllic to chilling in a mere 100 words. Nice. One typo…you need an s at the end of recall, I think.
shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks – and s will be inserted.
Very chilling. I’m not sure if the small body in the canal is a child they came with or simply one that Emily saw which tipped her over the edge, but either way, it’s a great story.
my intention it was their own child — but I can see it can be interpreted as any child.
Is “he” the protagonist or the antagonist? I think this story could be read in at least three different ways, and I find each darker than the next.
Purpose was a protagonist… and just a very very tragic accident…. and dealing with it in different ways.
A life with expectations has now become mechanical for him. very well-told.
Mechanical us a great way of seeing it….
What a last line! …a COLD FEELING…READING THIS!
yes. that’s devastating in many ways.
Thanks for the heads-up about breaking out the napkins. The last two sentences of your story conjured up striking images for me. Man, you packed a wallop in those two.
Thank you… Describing despair is kind a speciality of mine.
Yes, you’re right Björn, a sad one indeed, but beyond sad, an even colder sensation. the one of complete despair and futility. Well written!
Thank you Penny… a turningpoint indeed.
Was it the murder that drove Emily crazy?
I think it was the death of her child…
Oh…wow..I misread that.
I think the scythe might lead you to that
Yes…
i didn’t see it as a murder at all, very sad indeed.
I’m back to sad tales… and two reactions to disasters.
Bjorn, a wonderful job of telling a terribly sad story.
janet
Thank you Janet.. I think telling bleakness is something I know.
A dark story, but realistic. Conveys the story of the life of a family, gone quite wrong. So much said in 100 words!
Thank you, it’s a kind of story that fits me….:-)
Another great story from Mr. B. Sad, very sad but so well written 😉
Thank you.. yes I could not think about anything worse.
You packed a great tragic, chilling story in these 100 words !
Thank you ..:-)
That’s how quickly lives are turned on their heads… beautifully done.
Thank you … sometimes it’s just an instant.
Creepy and sad, both. Good job. This is a lot of story in 100 words.
Yes – every word counts
I love the practice of 100 word stories for just this reason. Every word must count.
Impossible to completely recover from the loss of a child–just hope one can learn to live with it and not go over the edge like Emily. Good portrayal of tragedy, Bjorn.
You are completely right … and there are different ways to escape or live with it.
When I saw “shriek” in italics I thought the story would take a very different turn.
Well done.
Thank you … It was mu mission to write bleak and sad again..
How awful! And how well written. You set the happy, peaceful scene so well, and then tear it to shreds with their discovery. Revealing that nothing was ever right again makes the grief even more powerful.
Thank you.. yes it’s the harsh reality.. accidents happens at the flip of a coin. Thank you for reading.
Another great one.
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/05/15/friday-fictioneers-5172013-genre-horror-humorous-pg13/
Thank you… 🙂 will be back to reading Friday night.
Bjorn, that was heart-rending, especially after the idyllic opening. It really gave you the sense of how horror can destroy a rather nice life and how nothing will ever be the same again afterward. Very well written.
I think that is how it really plays out many times.
Memories… A reason to keep going on in life!
Indeed 🙂
That was quite chilling. What a devastating thing to go through.
Has to be one of the worst things to go through… I have a friend whose daughter drowned in an accident…. we have lost contact though.
OMG! One of the best I’ve read so far. So sad.
Thank you …
Holy smokes. Life changes in the ‘blink of an eye’ –
With that kind of a tragedy it is amazing anyone still functions at all.
I can only mimic what others have stated. Well done.
Thanks.. a story that happens way to often.
Not quite the same but happened to my family. Father left with two young ones at the untimely death of ‘Mother’.
But one has to move on – nothing to be sorry about. Each has to handle such in their own way.
I’m thinking the baby drowned (every mother’s nightmare) and it pushed her over the edge. An extremely well written story, Bjorn. I also enjoyed your comments on several of the other blogs.
Thank you, yes i try to comment every one.. but I might not have the time this week.
Wow. So much emotion, from joy and love to grief and despair in so few words. Lovely story, in a sad way.
Thank you.. I think sadness playing out in memory is so much stronger.
from chilled Champagne to actual chills running down my spine… sad and frightening
Thank you. this was a story I saw quite quickly, but I had decided to go sad this time… and when I saw aqueduct this is what came to me.
Superbly written, if I may say so.
You told their complete life story here, the loss of a child – just tragic.
Well done
Dee
Thank you Dee,
Very good, Björn. Sad depiction of a family destroyed by tragedy. The scythe in the high grass at the end is great … the image conjures up the Grim Reaper, but in a very natural way. It’s only hinted at.
Lingustically, I’d prefer “new-mown”. “New mowed” or “newly mowed” would both be OK, but “new-mown” is the idiom.
Thank you John I missed that one, and it’s been corrected.
Kind of creepy in a very good, sad way.
As a matter I started to itch for a scythe as soon as I saw the picture
Bows to your talent at flash fiction! Wow, I am still recovering from the story and that final line. Almost Steinbeck!
In awe and now speechless…
Wow, Steinbeck – that’s high praise.
Nice way to flip the story on us, Bjorn. Let me see if I can find my footing. My heart is bleeding for them now. Well done.
I still think I included enough warning early in the story.
Another gut-punch post. Damn, you’re good at this!
Thank you Troy
The shriek and the scythe! Great intrigue, many ways to go here. Like it!
Thank you Perry..
Ooooh, that is chilling, particularly the image of the floating child. I knew it would be something grim because of her escape into medication – you set it up well. 🙂
Thank you. I wanted to bring it on slowly this time throwing in hints of disasters.
This is very sad and touching. The juxtaposition of blurred and photographic memory is great in explaining the shock and horror of what he must have experienced, along with Emily’s escape into medication – wonderful story.
I have a feeling that, this is how you experience things… The scythe I threw in as a way of casting doubt at the end of what really had happened.
Utterly and truly nightmarish, because for me, no matter what has gone on in your story, you’ve conveyed exactly how tragedy can and does strike without warning to end all our happy expectations. I need a stiff drink after reading this! Ann
Yes, it’s one of many way reality hits you. And when it does, it’s over.. No way back.
Definitely. Definitely. But hopefully, you can take something of use from the wreckage to take forward into the future.