My explorations into different kind of classic poetry continues. Today I try a rondeu, I choose to do it based on tetrameter, which seems to be the most common one for modern rondeaus in English. Thankfully I don’t have a picture for this, so I borrow one from wikipedia. Comments on both content and form is welcome.
I fail to see, my human mind
a neighbor’s faults we always find
but never, we can see the flaw
the neighbor sees in us, hah-hah
no, to those wrongs we must be blind
—
so let us stand and be aligned
the neighbors we can keep confined
they are a threat, so says the law
I fail to see…
—
but neighbors cannot stay behind
in justice feel they are maligned
for soldiers cheer, they say hurrah
our army’s strong, we are in awe
we go to war, it’s thus declined
I fail to see…
—
November 25, 2012
Björn Rudbergs writings 
I admire your adventurous soul–always trying and learning different forms! This one I must research, having heard about it but knowing nothing of its structure.
I therefore have no idea if yours is “true to form,” but I is quite beautiful either way.
I think it’s fairly close to the English version of the original so to speak. I have not researched into the French origin, but according to one source it was less strict on rhyme. But I like the repeated half line..
It has some similarities with Villanelle and triolet, and especially the Villanelle should be in your taste I think. 😉
The first stanza, (can I call it that?) was like the start of a story until it gradually progressed, I love it!
Oh thank you, I find it amazing that you can create stories by keeping to the strict format of an old French form, and then strengthen a story. 🙂
Hi Björn,
I know nothing about poetry so can’t comment on the structure, but I do love the sentiments expressed in this.